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too old at 40? - no referral :-(

(11 Posts)
stmalo Tue 04-Dec-12 20:35:26

Well I had an appointment with my gp this mornning and asked for a referral. She has said that because i have only had two miscarriages and I'm 40 that they would likely not see me.
I'm so frustrated, it took a year to get pregnant the first time and I miscarried at 14.5 weeks when i was 38, I was told it was due to my weight, So I've spent 18 months dieting to 10st 4ish, only to have a second miscarriage and now be told it's nothing to do with my weight and I'm just too old.
so fed up.

stmalo Wed 05-Dec-12 08:24:05

so I guess my questions are has anyone successfully had their 1st child after 40.
Has anyone got a referral despite being 40 or more.
Is it right to waste nhs money on a&E, scans, epu, gp, etc if all I need is a blood test?

I'm really depressed today - off to the hospital again for more basic bloods to check thyroid glucose etc - complete waste of time, and I have to get the HCG levels checked Again....

Geekster Wed 05-Dec-12 10:04:34

I had my dd at 39 after repeated miscarriage. I had to take aspirin daily as soon as I found out I was pregnant until 34 weeks. They had found a slight clotting issue but also mentioned that they recommend taking aspirin to anyone with repeat miscarriages over the age of 35. Might be worth asking about. I don't think it's a waste of NHS money when a woman's chances of having a baby are concerned. I hope you get some answers. Keep chasing them sometimes you just have to be pushy.

ThePoppyAndTheIvy Wed 05-Dec-12 10:16:23

Poor you sad. It is definitely NOT a waste of NHS money. Are you saying your GP won't refer you to a gynaecologist because of your age alone? Or is it because two miscarriages is "not enough" to be investigated?

Well done on losing weight, that should at least improve your chances of conceiving again in the first place although you really do need to know if there is a reason you are miscarrying. As Geekster said, I have a good friend who swears by the power of aspirin in pregnancy - she had 4 or 5 miscarriages one after the other, which the consultant could find no explanation for. Someone (just a friend of a friend, no-one medically trained) told her that she should take an aspirin a day when she next conceived and she would not miscarry. She was very hmm about it but thought it (anything) was worth a try & it worked - three times! She now has three DCs and has had no more miscarriages. Obviously, it cannot be as simple as aspirin being the magic answer for everyone or everyone would take it & miscarriages simply would not happen. It might be worth a try though?

Best of luck smile.

P.S. A family member who had "given up" trying has recently given birth to her first DC, at the age of 45.

Geekster Wed 05-Dec-12 10:24:21

It's not an exaggeration to say that aspirin was a wonder drug for us. After six miscarriages without aspirin the next time I was pregnant and took it we had our dd.

Themobstersknife Wed 05-Dec-12 10:31:05

I thought it was three miscarriages before referral? Regardless of age.
I had my first baby at 38. I got pregnant again at 40 and miscarried. I got pregnant again and had my second at 41.

ArkadyRose Wed 05-Dec-12 10:39:44

Themobsterknife Yep, regardless of age, they won't investigate until you've had 3 miscarriages.

Bakingtins Wed 05-Dec-12 14:40:14

I think it's more likely to be the "three miscarriages" guideline that is stopping the referral rather than your age, but can understand you feel the clock is ticking and you don't have time to mess about or emotional resources to go through a possible third miscarriage before they'll do anything.
I was told my recent miscarriage was probably linked to my age (38) though that doesn't explain the one I had 3 yrs ago before all my eggs were pickled confused. It's not helpful because it's one thing you can't do anything about. Whilst miscarriage risk does increase with age, there are plenty of women over 40 who have healthy pregnancies.
Is going private to have the initial tests done an option?

stmalo Wed 05-Dec-12 17:34:35

Hi thank you everyone,
With my first I was given low dose asprin from about 9-10weeks, until I miscarried at 14.5 weeks. When I was in A&E the doctor and the surgeon argued about who had prescribed asprin - when I brought this up later I was told I had misheard.......
With this one (8weeks ish) I hadn't booked in yet, so hadn't taken anything.
I'm fairly sure my gp was saying my age was the problem, husband agrees that was what was said.
I went for the hcg repeat test this morning, and the nurse was very helpful and has given me the number for the recurrent miscarriage unit, and has said leave it a week to see if the gp gets anywhere, then phone the recurrnet unit to ask what their criteria is and whether they would see me or not, so at least I know where I stand properly. So I feel a little bit more encouraged by that.
I just hate the thought of ending up in A&E again just so that I have the right statistics to be seen.

Thanks again everyone xx

stmalo Wed 05-Dec-12 17:36:11

sorry - bakingtins - not sure about going private, we asked the gp and she said you can make a private an appointment with a gynaecologist if you think that will help..
But we don't really know where to start with going private - need to do some google research! x

BartletForTeamGB Sat 08-Dec-12 15:22:47

Have a look at the RCOG guidelines:

A second trimester miscarriage merits investigation as much as 3 first trimester miscarriages so the clinic might see you on those grounds.

I'm sorry you are going through all of this, but I hope it might help to read through so you can discuss again an NHS appointment with your GP.

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