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One year on

(4 Posts)
newtonupontheheath Fri 23-Nov-12 19:09:58

I can't believe it's been a year already since my mmc.

I was 11 weeks when I went to be checked because of spotting and baby had died at 9 weeks.

Like many people who's stories I've read on hear, I was desperate-so desperate- to be pregnant still/again.

I was so lucky to get pregnant again almost straight away and we were blessed with the most perfect baby girl in October.

I've had a much easier ride than many people in here but the thought of my lost baby has not left me. It hurt so so much. The member of our family that will never be. But if it hadn't happened...well, I wouldn't have my little baby here now.

I don't really know why I'm posting... Maybe I just wanted to let people know that there is hope when you go through the shit. It does get better, time does heal but it never goes completely.

Or maybe I can post to remember my baby that never was. That nobody but me remembers. Another star in the sky.

Geekster Fri 23-Nov-12 19:24:59

I know what you mean, I had six miscarriages before we had our dd in march. I'm very happy but still sometimes think about those babies we lost. Though I must admit now we have a dd it's not as painful. Like you say if any of those others had been born I wouldn't have had my dd that I've got and I wouldn't change her for the world.

It doesn't matter if you have one miscarriage or several it's still painful.

Congratulations on your little girl.

TheAccidentalExhibitionist Fri 23-Nov-12 19:25:13

Thanks for the positive post. The memories never leave do they? I think the fact that it's like they never existed is the worst part of it.

newtonupontheheath Fri 23-Nov-12 20:23:39

Thank you for responding ladies. I don't really think I expected anybody to say anything. I've been bottling this up all week and its nice to just remember.

Geekster congratulations on your dd too smile

Theaccidentalexhibitionist It is. That's what it is. But he/she existed to me and I'll always remember him/her.

Sorry for your losses. And sorry if its insensitive of me to post here. I just want to show the light at the end of the tunnel.

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