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Today would have been babys due date

(9 Posts)
BabyBellasMumma Thu 25-Oct-12 13:45:21

I had a mmc in March, found out at 11 weeks baby had stopped developing at 8 weeks. Today would have been my babys due date.
I thought I was ok and had dealt with the miscarriage but today im feeling very emotional and keep bursting into tears for no reason. Is this normal?
I have been very lucky in the fact that I am now pregnant again so have a new pregnancy to focus on. But just surprised at how im feeling 2day, I wasnt expecting this at all.
I know most babys dont actually arrive on the due date, but I feel i would like to do something to mark the day but am unsure what?!?

MrsJohnDeere Thu 25-Oct-12 16:09:40

I should imagine that it is perfectly normal. I've just had a MMC and am dreading what would have been the due date (which is also my birthday).

How about planting something in the garden so that there's something nice and concrete to remember them by rather than just the 'I wonder' idle thoughts?

TunipTheVegemal Thu 25-Oct-12 16:14:05

I'm so sorry x
Why not plant some bulbs?
Above all, be kind to yourself. Chocolate and flowers and snuggle up in a warm jumper. I haven't had a mc myself but I have had friends who have and yes, it is not unusual to grieve.

Strawhatpirate Thu 25-Oct-12 16:22:38

I'm sorry! I found it helped to get out of the house, but you should do whatever you feel like. There are no rules and no one will judge you.

Mathsdidi Thu 25-Oct-12 16:32:07

I had a mc in April and my baby should have been due last week. I spent about 3 weeks leading up to the date really worrying about it and bursting into tears at the drop of a hat. I am not pregnant again and am not likely to be any time soon if dp gets his way as he doesn't want any more. I think that makes it harder in some ways, especially not being able to talk to dp about it because he really doesn't understand how utterly devastated I've been by this.

I do think it is absolutely normal to be upset on your due date. It's a horrible time.

I spent the day at work, being incredibly busy and snapping at any child who annoyed me (I'm a teacher).

goosey123 Thu 25-Oct-12 18:13:59

Sorry to read your post. I'm sure its normal. I'm dreading my due date next march, having miscarried quite late into the pregnancy. I think when you've been pregnant for some time, you have a vision of what you will be doing around the due date. I couldn't help myself, even though I knew things could go wrong.

ALthough I feel lots better now, I'm sure I will be upset at that time. I think its nice to do something to mark the day. I painted a picture after I lost the baby (I'm not by any means an artist but love drawing stuff). It really seemed to get things out of my system, and i have a keepsake now which will stay with me for ever x

Irishmammybread Thu 25-Oct-12 20:32:40

I know how you feel, I had a miscarriage at about 11 weeks in March too and my due date was on Monday. I also miscarried again in June at 6 weeks and at the beginning of September at 12 weeks(baby's heart had stopped at 8w6d) so I have a due date in Feb and March coming up too. I have three dc already who I love dearly but it doesn't stop the grief and longing for the little ones that I'll never have. As I'm 44 I'm not optimistic that we'll be able to have another baby.
On the due date I went to Church,had some quiet time thinking of my babies (and a bit of a cry!) and lit three candles, one for each.
Sorry to hear of everyone's losses

EthelredOnAGoodDay Thu 25-Oct-12 20:35:40

I know how you feel, I had mmc in feb, edd was in Sept. Luckily I am pregnant again and progressing well (fx) but I still felt a bit sad about it all. Maybe light a candle, or plant some nice bulbs for the spring? Thinking of you.

messtins Fri 26-Oct-12 08:25:09

I MC 3 years ago and despite having had a successful pregnancy since I always feel sad on the anniversary and due date. I recently MC again so now will have 4 sad days to get through. I've found it helpful to plan something positive for the day and I usually buy a baby related charity gift. Since I couldn't safely deliver my baby I can help another somewhere in the world get a good start. It does get easier each year. EDD of my first MC was my birthday so not much chance of forgetting that one..... Hoping to be pregnant again by the time the EDD of 2012 MC comes around. Hope the day passed gently for you. It's ok to be sad.

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