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how long do i have for natural miscarriage?

(6 Posts)
acsr1987 Sat 20-Oct-12 13:38:58

how long will they give me before im forced to hav something done, im petrified of internals and i cant bare it, i found out 2 days ago my baby died about 5 days ago at 9 weeks, i said i want to wait, and im going back in 2 weeks for a scan i just cant cope, i honestly think if it wasnt for my 12 month son id kill myself. i cant do this i just feel like im drowning i dont know what to do

Geekster Sat 20-Oct-12 16:53:38

So sorry to hear you are going through this horrible time. The waiting for anything to happen is horrible it feels like you are stuck in limbo and will never be happy again. As awful as it is what you are feeling is a normal reaction to this horrible shock. Like you say your 12 month old son needs you.

If nothing has happened in two weeks they might need to do an ERPC. If that is the case it is honestly nothing to worry about. You are asleep for the procedure and it is relatively painless, I didn't have any sort of internal when I had mine.

Have you got someone you can talk to if you are feeling this low? If you feel you can't wait two weeks you can speak to the hospital or your GP. Horrible as it is once you know everything has come away, you may find it easier to deal with this limbo is horrible.

We are here if you need to talk. I hope you will be okay. Xx

Jollyb Sat 20-Oct-12 21:10:03

Hi so sorry to hear about your news. Miscarriages are shit.

In your situation I wonder if you'd be better going straight for an ERPC rather than waiting to pass naturally. You wouldn't have to have an internal for this (apart from when you're under anaesthetic) - a 'natural' miscarriage can be quite a drawn out process and it sounds like you are struggling psychologically.

Maybe it's worth giving your early pregnancy unit a ring on Monday

Beardy24 Sat 20-Oct-12 22:57:56

So Sorry for your loss acsr1987...I too am going through the same thing as we speak but this is my first pregnancy....I had a scan on Monday just gone which confirmed things aren't as they shouldn't be...I would have been 9 weeks on thursday, I have booked in for the op next Friday as I'm not sure how much longer I can take the waiting...I was hoping things would happen naturally before then as I'm so so so scared of having an op...but nothing seems to be moving...I need it all to be over now then I can grieve properly which I think would be the best thing for you to do. Be kind to yourself. Please stay strong for your little one, keep on going x

calmlychaotic Sun 21-Oct-12 02:26:31

So sorry this has happened to you, I had similar feelings when I had mine, I promise you will feel better. Natural miscarriage can take a long time, I have had both natural and a d & c, I hate anything medical, distrust doctors, hate internals, even smears so I understand what you mean but please don't worry, should you have to have medical management, it is over quickly, mine was painless, staff where lovely. I would of course be distraught if I ever had another miscarriage but I wouldn't worry about the medical side of it. It is a horrible feeling being in limbo like you are at the moment. Although I wanted the process over I almost didn't because it was final then, once it was over though I could start to come to terms with it, its 3 months later for me, I have come to terms with it, I do feel sad sometimes but I no longer cry. I have a 2year old and he really kept me going. I found the support on here really helped me too. Thinking of you x

acsr1987 Wed 24-Oct-12 21:22:32

thanks everyone, i am going into hospital tomorro to see about having tablets and pesseries to speed things up, i cant stand the thought of my baby being sucked out of me in bits and me not getting to see it i want to feel it coming out and i want to see it all, i want the control, the thought of having a d&c makes me feel sick, the thought of some stranger poking and proddin me while im asleep and i dont know whats happening makes me freak out, ive been to the doctor and she has prescribed me some diazapam to take before i go to chill me out. ugh i hate this

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