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Post MC feeling very bitter and wanting to slap the Dr!!!!

(4 Posts)
InsomniaQueen Fri 17-Jun-11 12:08:20

Just got back from the most pointless Dr's appointment ever......all she said was wait a month and try again. There was nothing in the Dr's notes to worry about and "it's more common than I realise", not to blame myself and try to relax over the next few days.

The more she said the more I cried......as much as I know all this in my head in my heart I just feel bitter and angry!!! Im so angry at myself for getting excited - maybe if I hadn't it wouldn't feel so much like a kick in the teeth. I'm even more angry at myself for feeling like this - I know all the things the Dr said are true and its not her fault any of this has happened and I know that odds are I could try again and it could be fine but right now I just want to destroy something because my heart doesn't care about the statistics!!!

I keep having dreams about babies and waking up feeling sooooo happy then I realise that it's a dream and it all feels shit again! Even though I know a lot of women on here are dealing with a lot worse and I am trying to at least think of the things I still have......it feels very difficult at the moment!!!!

Twittwooo Fri 17-Jun-11 13:00:46

Hi, I wanted to reply to your message because I'm going through a miscarriage at the moment and I know how heart breaking it is. I knew I was miscarrying on Wednesday morning and saw a doctor that evening. I'm so sorry to hear about your experience and your feeling after seeing the doctor. Being told how common it is doesn't help, although for me it is helpful to know I'm by no means alone and that it doesn't mean anything is wrong. Today is the first day I haven't cried, and I think I'm slowly beginning to come to terms with things so hopefully it will get better for you too. I think reading and writing on this forum really helps too, so let it all out. Look after yourself. xx

InsomniaQueen Fri 17-Jun-11 14:16:53

Twittooo I think it was just the shock of having to say it out loud to someone else - no one close knows except me and hubby and just knowing that she would be cancelling the appointments for midwife and scan was pretty hard going.

It feels horrible but I've calmed down after completely losing it this morning!!! Knowing that other people are dealing with the same thing makes it feel a lot less lonely.

Hope we both feel much better in the coming weeks and hope that next time works out for both of us!!!!
Xxxxx

Twittwooo Fri 17-Jun-11 15:01:16

I really hope that too. I completely understand what you mean about saying it out loud to someone. I had been at work all day on Wednesday, knowing what was happening to me but not able to do anything about it. After work, in the car, I called the GP surgery and spoke to the receptionist asking if I could speak to a doctor. She asked if it was urgent, so I had to tell her the reason and could barely speak for crying. I was the same when the doctor called me back.

I had considered my reaction if this was to happen and thought I would cope much better than I did initially, but I am feeling much better already and I'm glad you are too.

I started a thread on this forum about my experience, more for theraputic reasons than anything else, called 'miscarriage at 6 weeks'. You might relate to some of what I have written - it's only me and my husband who know about our sad news too and although I think that's the right way for us, I'm not sure if it makes it any easier.

Lots of love, take care.
xxx

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