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MY friends loss

(6 Posts)
yummychoccycake Tue 07-Jun-11 13:40:33

Hi,

One of my good friends had her baby last week, but had already passed away.
I feel devastated for her and her family. Understandably she is finding it hard to talk to anyone about it and i have yet to see her, im trying to give her space and time and i know she will when she is ready.
I desparatly want to be a good friend to her and to try and be a support but at the same time I dont want to overcrowd her.

I thought about seeing if she needs any help with ironing or something?
What can I do to help but not necessarily invading her privacy?

Thankyou

shouldbeelswhere Tue 07-Jun-11 13:54:21

You sound like a really good friend, write what you've said here in a card and post it through her door...then she'll know that you acknowledge how devastated she must be, how hard it is to see anyone afterwards, how powerless you feel in helping her and you're offering practical help too. Then she'll know that you're there for her without intruding so early on. Maybe you could follow it up with another one in a week or so suggesting meeting up? You might want to look at the miscarriage association website they offer support to anyone affected by the loss of a child.

yummychoccycake Tue 07-Jun-11 14:00:58

Thankyou that sounds a nice idea, that way she hasnt got to talk or see me face to face, but at least she'll know i care.

LunaticFringe Tue 07-Jun-11 22:00:41

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

stmalo Wed 08-Jun-11 20:59:43

You sound a lovely friend - but please don't give your friend too much space, talking things over with friends is good therapy - as is shopping! My friends sent flowers, which were lovely, but I just really want to talk to people smile but didn't want to, all at the same time! - My close friend came round, and I'm so glad she did. We talked and laughed and cried, and we we went out for lunch, it was great.

yummychoccycake Thu 09-Jun-11 11:30:38

Thanks for your advice, its sounds as if you've had an awful time too sad.

Maybe I will gently approach her again.

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