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D&C reassurance

(14 Posts)
cmt0209 Wed 18-May-11 11:00:48

Hi. I don't normally post but have found plenty of support and reassurance in the message boards and wanted to share my recent experience, in case it helps anyone in the same boat.

Unfortunately I suffered a missed miscarriage this week. I had a little bleeding on Monday at 10 weeks pg, managed to get a private scan that same day which I really thought would tell me it was all ok - but unfortunately the baby had died a couple of weeks ago. Very hard to understand, especially as I had a scan at 6.5 weeks and heard a lovely strong heartbeat.

I saw my Gp yesterday who advised me to have a d&c as I still wasn't really bleeding spontaneously and my temperature was up so he was concerned about infection. Somehow we managed to get a slot yesterday lunchtime ( luckily I hadn't been able to face food that morning so was already nil by mouth) and I was home last night.

For anyone out there who might sadly have to consider a d&c I wanted to let you know it was really ok. I had never had an anaesthetic or any type of operation before but it was quick and straightforward and the staff were amazingly supportive. The anaesthetic kept me under for the operation itself plus about 15 mins, and I woke up feeling strangely refreshed and relatively comfortable. I was in hospital for a few hours for observation then home at 7pm, having gone for the op at 2pm. I've had light bleeding but not too bad, and feel a bit uncomfortable (sort of achy) but ibuprofen helps..

So... it isn't pleasant but it really isn't so bad - far easier than I thought it would be, and less painful. I'm sure it's different for everyone but hopefully, if you do have to go through this, it'll be ok. The emotional side is definitely the tougher part. In many ways, the procedure and the busy-ness around it was a distraction so the immense sadness is just hitting me more today. Though I'm sure it'll get easier.

Anyway, good luck to anyone out there going through something similar and take care x

whatsoever Mon 23-May-11 18:17:11

cmt thanks for your post. I am going in for surgery tomorrow after finding out I had had a MMC today at my 12 week scan. I have definitely taken comfort and reassurance from your story. I hope you are recovering well.

cmt0209 Tue 24-May-11 23:10:58

I hope it all went well today and that you're taking time to rest and recover. It's 1 week after for me now and physically I've still been fine. Bleeding has only been very light and has all but stopped now.

I'm still feeling very sad... which I'm sure you will too. Strangely tired today too, which I think is just part of being back at work and having to put a brave face on it all.

Anyway, hope you managed to get through this with as little discomfort as possible and that you feel better soon, on all levels.
take care

whatsoever Wed 25-May-11 08:49:30

I got out of hospital at 11.15pm last night. It was a very long day as I had to come in at 11am but I was last on the afternoon list but I was determined to get out within the day.

The op itself seems to have gone ok. I had some pain when I came round which got worse but codeine sorted that out. Had a funny turn back on the ward where my blood pressure dipped but I suspect this was from being nil by mouth for 10 hours as a drip sorted me out. The bleeding has not been bad.

The hospital staff were all fantastic. At the moment I can keep it together if I medicalise ( if I say "product" and "material") but the word "baby" sets off immediate sobs. I could hear a baby crying when I was waiting for my paperwork before being admitted yesterday and it was like torture.

We are supposed to be going to a friend's 30th birthday this Sunday. His fiancé is 8 months pregnant so I have decided not to go - it would be too hard to me to see someone so visibly pregnant but I also think it would be very stressful to her to see someone who has had bad pregnancy news, which is the last thing she will need to think about.

I think after today's recovery day I will hit the sad phase you talk of. At the moment my mum and dad are here to look after me as my husband has gone to work but I think me and my husband need to actually get on with the grieving process if we can move forward.

Missgiraffe1 Wed 25-May-11 10:42:56

So sorry to hear your sad news, and for your loss Whatsoever. You were on the December thread weren't you? So wish were were still there, instead of here, but such is life. Still lurk there every now and then (although I don't necessarily know whether this is a good or bad idea - depends on how I'm feeling that day).

Hope your recovery is quick and as painless as possible. Like cmt, I had very little bleeding and practically no pain. back to work one week later, physically fine. Emotionally, however, well .... it's a rollercoaster we have no option but to ride sad . I get a lot of comfort from knowing that people on here know and understand how I feel though.

And sorry for your loss too cmt. I thought your post was very thoughtful. The first thing I did when considering what the heck to do myself was come on here and look for advice on what the surgery was like. I'm sure many more people will have read this and found it really helpful.

whatsoever Wed 25-May-11 12:20:19

Missgiraffe1 yep, I was on the December bus too. I popped back on Monday but I think I'll try to avoid it from now on as I don't want to erupt into the green eyed monster at the happy news of others!

Good to hear you were back at work after a week, I am planning to go back on Tuesday after the bank holiday. I have 2 days annual leave booked the following week so I will only have to muddle through 4 days.

cmt0209 Wed 25-May-11 22:22:37

Whatsoever - I'm glad to hear things went ok and that you have your m&d there to look after you. I'm sure it will unfortunately hit you soon but it sounds like you have lovely support. I fully understand about the 30th and think that sounds like just the right choice. I definitely had a good few days when I didn't want to see anyone at all and think having that time is just part of it.

Missgiraffe1 - I'm very sorry to hear your news. Hope your managing ok. Work isn't such a bad distraction is it? I went back in on mon and got quite into it, then was totally useless and distracted all day tues! Managed a bit better today but think it'll just be one day at a time for the moment.

Got a bit pd off today by my doctor. I asked him when we could start trying again, expecting him to be quite relaxed but he took the 3 months rest line. It was just over email so not on the basis of an examination or anything but a little disheartening - seems like forever. Have either of you asked the question of your docs?

Take care

Missgiraffe1 Thu 26-May-11 08:26:55

Work's not bad, it was definitely time to get back. Sitting around watching rubbish TV (and occasionally torturing myself watching baby programs - really stupid) bored me senseless, but I was too tired for a few days to do anything else.

I haven't actually asked anyone re ttc. Wish I had though. All the MW said before I left was not to have sex until the bleeding stopped, and that she hoped to see me back very soon and getting a happy reassurance scan. I've not read anything that suggests there is medical advice backing up the need to wait 3 months. Haven't found anything (reliable) which suggests getting pg again straight away would be higher risk either - although I get the impression that some women think this maye be the case, if you don't let your uterus lining replenish itself?? Someone posted the Royal College of Obstetrics advice on another thread, I'll post a link.

I had to wait 3 months after getting methotrexate last year for ectopic (as the 3 month is agreed medical advice due to fact methx attacks growing cells) and it felt like an eternity.

I think I'm just going to go for it. I really don't want to put it off.

Missgiraffe1 Thu 26-May-11 08:29:50

http://www.rcog.org.uk/files/rcog-corp/MiscarriageRecoveringWell.pdf

See page 8. x

whatsoever Thu 26-May-11 12:19:52

cmt I haven't asked but we were planning to start TTC as soon as we felt emotionally ready. Talked about it last night and I said I was worried if we tried straight away and it worked we might spend the whole time terrified it would happen again but DH pointed out we probably will anyway and I think he's right.

Friends of ours miscarried and got pregnant again immediately and had been told you are super fertile immediately following a MC. No idea if that is fact or myth but we figured worth a try given it took 10 months to get pregnant this time.

I wish you both all the luck in the world when you are ready to TTC again smile

BlueCrane Thu 26-May-11 16:08:33

cmt , whatsoever and missgiraffe so sorry you're going through this - there seem to be a few of us from the Dec thread who have suffered this. I had my 12 week scan this morning and found out I have a mmc...have decided to go the natural route but just starting to do some research about it all and not looking forward to the next few weeks at all! It's starting to sink in more about what I have in store physically and emotionally.

whatsoever Thu 26-May-11 17:30:01

BlueCrane so so sorry to hear that, I had my fingers and toes crossed for you.

Threads like these have helped me so much since Monday - just knowing there are a few of us going through the same thing makes it feel less lonely although obviously I wouldn't wish this on anyone.

Missgiraffe1 Thu 26-May-11 23:10:57

Oh blue, so so sorry to hear that. Hope you're doing ok. Probably in that surreal place right now. Am using (annoying) phone just now, will post properly later.
Thinking of you though.

cmt0209 Sun 29-May-11 22:26:35

BlueCrane - very sorry to hear that. Hope you're doing ok and coming to terms with everything.
Take care

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