getting down my maternity clothes from loft tomorrow and selling them on ebay

[TheLadyOfTheGreenKirtle]

Ive had enough. its been 5 years now, and I can't put my body through any more. my teitze's is too painful so getting pg would not be a good move anyway, but I feel so sad about it. seems like a final step. like im giving up and letting them all down.

[galwaygal]

LOTGK - so sorry to see you lose hope but I guess you know what you can and cannot cope with at this stage. You are not letting anyone down, your situation is not your fault. Remember many people in your situation would have given up a long time ago. I feel sad for you, but (this is r-days by the way, in a new guise), I think I know you well enough, to know that you would not be taking this step lightly and I genuinely hope that it might lead to a peace and later acceptance about where you are. I feel cruel saying it, as I never want to give up hope for your miracle. But I can understand a bit of what you are going through. I don't know when I will reach the stage you are at, I suppose all I can do is , pray that you get loads of dosh off of unwitting ebayers, to help ease the pain. Perhap we need a "hut" here on the miscarriage thread now.

[Bex22]

I completely understand what you are doing, but we had four mcs and were trying for nearly 6 years before I got pregnant with my DS. To be honest, I had completely given up and focused instead on other things- started going for promotion at work, moved house and got a dog and then actually got pregnant and it stayed (was injecting with heparin too) but it was equivocal whether I had a problem or not. Don't want to sway you from your decision at all, but just to remind you that things can change- but not in ways you can predict. I don't know your situation at all and so I say this with all respect- please don't take the wrong way. You are very, very brave to take this step, and I hope it all works out for you in some way.

[TheLadyOfTheGreenKirtle]

thank you both. i feel very sad about it but I have to do it. im too ill to have much sex anyway and am on a cocktail of drugs to keep the teitzes in check, i just dont think i can cope anymore. we had difficulty conceiving ds too and i think we need to accept that he is our miracle.

[TheLadyOfTheGreenKirtle]

thanks, i just feel that maybe Im clinging onto a dream that just isnt going to materialise. when i was a girl i wanted to be a world famous author. that didnt happen. then i wanted to be an actress. neither did that.

just because you have to accept you wont get all your dreams, doesnt mean your life is over.

[JustKeepSwimming]

You sound very brave, although I have no idea with a teitze is (may have to google!).

If it were someone else telling you the same, think of the reassuring words you would say to them.

If a miracle occurs, think of the fun of buying more stuff:)

[Aitch]

for my friend.

[rubyslippers]

(((hug)))

[TheLadyOfTheGreenKirtle]

aw thank you for the squeezes, im at docs tomorrow to arrange yet another xray so will ask then for the coil. ive had breaks before, but this time it feels v final.

teitzes is a condition that causes the cartilige joining rib to sternum/spine to inflame pushing the rib out. as a result all of my ribs are deformed and i have reduced movement in my arms and shoulders. v apinful.

[Julezboo]

(((hugs)) Totally understand why you are doing it. I am still going to hope you get your miracle though :)

[CarGirl]

for you, very hard and painful decision to make in addition to coping with such a painful and debiliting condition.

[mumatron]

i thought this might be you before i opened the thread.

((hugs)) from me too.

i will keep my fingers crossed for a miracle for you too

[TheLadyOfTheGreenKirtle]

thank you all. i feel totally at peace with my decision now. its ok. ive been in mourning for 5 years, ive felt so guilty for such a long time. its time to accept that which i cannot change.

[galwaygal]

- I am really happy that you have found the peace that you need for your decision. I will miss seeing you on the ttc threads, but might catch you elsewhere on mn ! {{{{{hug}}}}}

[Aitch]

as they say at church, peace be with you, lis.