Sex life after the menopause

[alypoole]

I love Mumsnet and have a lot of faith in all you mumsnetters out there. Can anyone tell me how to achieve a satisfactory sex life after the menopause without HRT? HELP!!!

[PollyPerky]

what is the problem?
Low libido?
Dry vagina?
Gone off partner?

[Crispsheets]

Well I'm 57 and still on her and sex is amazing.
I'm considering coming off it and would be interested to hear responses

[alypoole]

Low libido yes, but mainly lack of response. HRT made a HUGE difference but had a bit of a scare and decided to stop. Things changed slowly but now I'm back to pre-HRT days. I'm 64 but intimacy is a big part of our lives and I don't want this to continue, especially as I know there is something that can make a difference. Do I take the risk and go back on it. Local GP's are no help.

[igivein]

I'd love to hear any tips.
I'm post meno, zero libido, wouldn't care if I never dtd again, but this is so unfair on dh.
I've not tried hrt because I'm high risk for breast cancer.

[PollyPerky]

Can't really help if you don't say what a 'bit of a scare' means. Breast lump? Blood clot? What did your dr say?

The only real contraindications are active blood clot, active or previous breast cancer, heart attack, and really strong family history of breast cancer- which means a mum or sister with BC before 40 .

Consultants are now recommending testosterone for libido. You may need to see a consultant for this and it may have to be paired with oestrogen to prevent developing male characteristics. Testo is mentioned in the NICE guidelines so it's not wacky!

[alypoole]

Started to bleed but had all the necessary tests and they were fine. It did frighten me though.

[thegirlupnorth]

I had same problem and am on hrt. Husband and I bought some toys and it's helped us get our mojo back. I also dressed very provocatively and he took me out and we were almost like we were on a date. We couldn't wait to get home and rip each other's clothes off. It's really helped us.

[PollyPerky]

Aly if you had the tests done by a consultant - biopsy, hysteroscopy etc- they should advise on HRT now. Depends so much on what kind of HRT you were using, (conti or sequi) , how long on it, dose etc.

Also depends on what reason was suggested for bleeding and if you had a thick lining or not.

At 64 if you have had a longish gap from HRT you would be given a low dose to start with and it would be transdermal.

If you find your GP no help you should find a private gynae who specialises in meno.