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Menopausal lows

(8 Posts)
mandymelv Wed 11-May-16 08:43:30

Hi this is my first post on here, am 44 & clearly menopausal - but really struggling with anxiety & moods and would love some help or advice.
I am usually a happy bubbly person , but since menopausal , struggling to sleep, feeling tearful , moods are really low one week and I can't cope then the week after I feel fantastic and treasure every minute of feeling good. The lows are awful but I don't want antidepressants . Can anyone offer advice. They are that bad at the moment I feel I want to divorce my lovely husband which isn't like me at all!! Are any of you struggling like this too?

daisytalks Wed 11-May-16 09:32:47

This is me all over! Going thru a bit of a low at the mo sad the last couple of days, so I'd be really interested to see what others say can help. I also definitely don't want to go the antidepressants route - but I do find a bit of exercise and watching your diet helps a bit (cut out refined sugar where u can). I also take magnesium supplements, vit D, C & zinc - and feel they do help some symptoms. It's a tough time for sure

mandymelv Wed 11-May-16 09:36:18

Hi thank god not just me. I have the magnesium too. Do you feel constantly tired too? Agnes cactus is supposed to be good but it's getting the right dose? Hopefully we will get some replies. It's awful isn't it.

daisytalks Wed 11-May-16 09:45:09

Definitely not just you! It's so awful how the hormones just take over and you can feel so happy one week and life's all good then that horrible low/anxiousness comes over you and everything seems a bit of a struggle ..have a brew and hopefully someone will advise smile

Stainedglassfan Fri 13-May-16 13:45:21

After a lifetime of period problems and an inability to conceive, 7 years ago a microwave endometrial ablation freed me from a life that was constant bleeding and a daily regime of high dosage pain management. My life changed. I became a high successful mature student with a first class BSc. Hons, a Merit MA and I had started a PhD. My husband and I enjoyed our life and our love.

I am 53 now and started to show clear peri-menopausal symptoms in the late autumn of last year.

From that moment I have gone from being a happy, vibrant, confident and loving woman, who was in training with a friend to run her first marathon, to the absolute mirror image of my former self. A woman who now has agrophobia and requires daily administration of pain management again (which has to be done by my husband, because I become confused and disorientated very quickly).

My gynaecologist has refused a hysterectomy on the grounds that I am,

a) Possibly close to the end of my time, although she agrees this is a guess and not substantiated by scientific fact (she refuses to measure my hormone levels because of my age - and the cost! I've offered to cash in my savings bond to pay for private tests and care, but she keeps telling me there is no point).

Unhelpfully she has also observed that I might continue to suffer these symptoms until I am in my early 60's. Although heaven knows where she pulled that little gem from.

b) 3kg overweight. She also concedes that I am unlikely to be able to shift the weight because of the medication I am now on and the fact that I've had to give up my exercise regime because of the effects of anaemia (I've bled constantly for 3 months now).

c) in an area of the country which is poorly resourced with gynae-surgical beds.

So frankly, life appears pretty damn awful at the moment. I have been prescribed tranquilisers for depression and my suicidal thoughts and sleeping tablets for the lack of sleep.

What I need is a hysterectomy and a chance to get my life back, but I have no fight left in me.

A couple of nights ago I caught my own husband crying out of sheer desperation at the effect that this nightmare has had on both of us. He has also been prescribed sedatives. Needless to say, he never cashed the prescription believing that it is a pointless treatment for a man who is the only wage earner in the household. Besides if he is on sedatives how can he be trusted to deliver my pain management.

I lost my job over the amount of sick days I needed and have been unable to find another.

Unfortunately, I am with the top NHS gyne consultant in my catchment area - so seeking a second opinion (which I have already sought), has proved pointless.

On the days I can get out of bed, I sit and cry. On the days I can't get out of bed, I sit and cry and stare at the bedroom wall.

I can no longer go out walking because of the bleeding and the pain from my cyst infested ovary.

My advise to anyone reading this is - RIGHT NOW, GO AND INSIST YOU HAVE

- your hormone levels checked
- your thyroid checked
- your blood iron checked.

LAY ON THE DAMN FLOOR OF YOUR GP's SURGERY KICKING AND SCREAMING if you have to. Do not give up. LET the NHS know you are freaking serious about protecting your health and NEVER let yourself get into the situation that my long suffering husband and I have.

The peri-menopause has to be taken seriously, it is not enough to dismiss it as something you will effectively "grow out of." Cuts in the NHS have thrown this time in a woman's life back into the 18th Century, when we were addressed as having "hysterical vapours."

I just wish that I had realised how fast one can go downhill and the devastating effect it can have on the people that love us.

PollyPerky Fri 13-May-16 15:26:00

Gosh that all sounds awful.

So your bleeding has come back and you are bleeding even after the EA some years ago?

Have you been offered a Mirena coil? Another ablation? HRT to try to regulate the bleeding?

You are unlikely to carry on bleeding into your 60s if that is what she means!

So action plan! Why not use your savings to see another consultant? You don't have to stick with the NHS- private medicine is available if you can fund it. If you lived in Scotland you could see a dr in London- some consultants have patients who fly from all over the world to see them. See someone else, pay for the operation if you can, or ask that consultant to put you on their NHS list. There are options- you don't have to stick with one dr - and she can't be the best if she's treating, or rather not not treating you, this way!

PollyPerky Fri 13-May-16 15:27:43

I assume your dr ha at least done or offered a TVS- transvaginal scan- to see if you have fibroids, a thick endometrial lining, or something more serious which is the causing this bleeding?

PollyPerky Fri 13-May-16 16:02:52

what is causing your pain? Why do you need the painkillers?

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