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Really struggling with emotions/anxiety

(14 Posts)
Mummytron Sun 17-Apr-16 09:34:13

A few days before my period is due my pmt is horrendous.
I'm 40 and convinced I've been peri for a year or so. I have trouble sleeping, hot sweats, palpitations at hormonal times, periods are two day heavy fest but still fairly regular.
But the feelings I get before I'm due on are crippling. I'm irritated by everything, noise especially. I'm panicky, tearful, can't think straight and it's awful.
What is going on?

FrameyMcFrame Sun 17-Apr-16 10:43:52

Sounds familiar, I'm 41 and have it too, some months are worse than others and I can find I only have a few days of feeling ok per month as I feel really awful around ovulation too. Have you noticed your periods becoming irregular? Mine have gone closer together and heavier.

Mummytron Sun 17-Apr-16 11:16:54

My periods are sooo heavy. All in two days, in and out of the loo most hours!
Still fairly regular but have shortened from 28 days to 24 days x

CrepeDeChineWag Sun 17-Apr-16 11:43:00

Hey mummytron I know exactly what you're talking about. This started happening to me about 3 years ago, I'm 45. My Dr advised me to keep a mood diary in line with my cycle. I dully noted what kind of mood I was in - I used emojis for quick reference - against each day of my cycle together with everything I'd eaten and drunk, what kind of a sleep I'd had and any exercise. I began to see a pattern. My mood dipped massively at certain points in my cycle but interestingly the severity of how awful/raging/weepy/anxious I felt was affected greatly by alcohol and sugary/junk food and (lack of) exercise.

I started exercising regularly, eating very healthily but not dieting so cutting sugar/processed food and alcohol out to virtually nothing (a couple of glasses of wine once a month, a piece of cake once a month etc) and generally tried to take care better care of myself. I lost some weight (I needed to) and felt so much better generally. It really really helped. Anxiety disappeared though i could still feel a little low/ragey at certain times it was at a level that I could cope with. Sounds totally boring but actually being 'boring' was a much much nicer place to be than in the pit of despair i had been in.

I have of course had times when I've slacked off and after a couple of weeks I can feel those feelings of doom and gloom coming back. It's clear that food/alcohol/exercise has a direct link for me, your physiology may be different
and you may already be super fit and super healthy in which case I can only offer my empathy.

CrepeDeChineWag Sun 17-Apr-16 11:49:58

just to add, in terms of periods I was always 30/31 bang on. Then 4 years ago i dropped suddenly to 28/29 initially I put this down to stress but it stayed like this for a good couple of years or so. I didn't notice a change of mood at first but 3 years ago as I said in my earlier post things started feeling very wrong. I did wonder if I was starting to lose my mind and becoming unravelled hence the visit to the Dr. My periods are now all over the place, my last period was 2 weeks early the one before that 2 weeks late. They are heavier but shorter in duration. I had my bloods done almost a year ago and they came back 'within the normal range' but clearly I am peri menopause.

Mummytron Sun 17-Apr-16 12:03:25

Hi crepe
Firstly I'm NOT super fit!! 😁
I think there's some weight in what you're saying but it does sound boring!
I have had a bit of a lifestyle change lately and lost a bit of weight (need to lose more!) and I have an autoimmune disease so I generally feel rubbish.
Thanks for all your posts it's just nice to know I'm not cracking up...yet! X

CrepeDeChineWag Sun 17-Apr-16 12:24:34

It is boring, kind of though I do habe my moments! I'm just more thoughtful about when I get hammered etc and (try) and save it for high days and holidays rather than say a saturday night in, in front of the telly.

My 20 year old self would be horrified at how boring and sensible i've become. My 45 year old self sometimes feels that way too grin

It's a shame that there isn't more research into the role that hormones play in governing your life. I think they have a LOT to answer for.

PollyPerky Sun 17-Apr-16 12:29:22

Mummy- Why not see your GP? This sounds a bit like an early peri menopause. As the PP suggested, there are loads of lifestyle / self help things you can try for PMS which gets worse towards menopause. But if you are having really heavy periods see your Gp? Have you thought about the Mirena coil to help?

Mummytron Sun 17-Apr-16 12:32:02

Hi polly
I have been to the GP lots but they are pretty unhelpful as I'm 'too young!'
It's rubbish as my sister and mum went through it by 45. I had blood tests which were normal. I have been asked about the mirage coil but I'm not keen to be honest. I know that sounds silly when I'm suffering but there we are x

PollyPerky Sun 17-Apr-16 12:53:53

Can you see another GP? If early meno runs in your family then you are not too young- by and large women's meno age is the same as their mum's. (some exceptions of course.)

Go back and see another GP if you can and be more assertive. Tell them about your mum. TBH there are so many GPs who know next to nothing about menopause that it's not surprising you are palmed off.

The tests you had done- when were they done? They have to be done on day 2-5 of your cycle and repeated maybe a couple of time (over 2-3 months) to be accurate. A single blood test at any old time of the month is not the way to do it, if that's what happened.

earlyperi Sun 17-Apr-16 17:41:24

I have lurked here quite a lot recently and wanted to jump in and ask a question about age ranges as Polly seems to know a lot about this area and I am a similar age to the OP

I am 41 and have been experiencing these symptoms for just under a year. Escalation of PMT moods. Cycle down to 24 or 22 days but regular and never miss one. Some hot flushes. Some palpitations. Terrible ovulation pains. Sleep problems. Basically classic perimenopausal things from what I've read.

However I didn't consider myself to be particularly young to be perimenopausal given that websites say this gradual wind down can last for many years. Up to 10 years or even longer? That would take me to 51 which is about average age for menopause. Even if this stage only lasts 5 years, I will have my last period at 45 and then be officially menopausal a year later at 46 which isn't much younger than average either.

Am I being complainant? Is there a medical reason to go to the GP and insist on tests? Is there something they need to do if you're 41 but still having periods or is it more a case of comfort and symptom management?

PollyPerky Sun 17-Apr-16 18:27:19

Hi early
You are right, basically. There is a wide variation. Meno tends to occur from 45-55 . The average age in the UK is 51-52. Meno (final period) before the age of 45 is considered an early meno. Before 40 is considered premature meno. Very loosely, although 45 is not too 'early' anyone with no periods from 45 should be mindful of their risk of osteoporosis because they are going to be without oestrogen for around 7 years longer than the 'average' woman (52) and this is a risk factor. I have read that some consultants regard early meno as 47, not 45.

The gradual changes can take 10 years but tbh I doubt the early ones are very noticeable. It might be just cycles shorten by a couple of days for 2-3 years, then another couple of days for another 2-3 years and so on.

My own experience was that in my teens and early 20s I had long cycles of average 32 days (sometimes 35.) In my 30s they were around 28-30 days and in my 40s around 26-28 days. I think I was around 47 when I had some slight changes- I noticed the flow would last for 3 days then it might stop for a day or so then start again for 3 days. I also had some mid-cycle spotting at that time.
I didn't miss a period at all until I was about 52 and then they became lighter but still almost regular before stopping around 53 when I'd had some odd cycles of 17 days.

This might seem a long-winded way of answering your questions! If your periods stop before 45 you should see your GP because NICE does recommend seriously considering HRT up to 52-ish at least for bone protection.
Sorry for the essay!

PollyPerky Sun 17-Apr-16 18:30:21

And one more point- if your symptoms are really affecting your quality of life then you could ask for HRT now depending on blood tests. NICE tells GPs not to test women over 45 but just to treat symptoms) but to test women under 45 with symptoms.

earlyperi Sun 17-Apr-16 18:42:11

Thank you for such a detailed answer. That does help to explain it.
I'm ashamed to say that until recently I just assumed menopause meant waking up one day aged 50 and never having another period followed by some night sweats and dry skin. I had no idea there was a run-up to it that could start in a woman's 30's or 40's.
Nobody ever mentions this stuff. I have friends who are 5+ years older than me but a lot of them have gone over to the coil or got pregnant or been breastfeeding at my age so maybe they just blamed any the early symptoms on that or on stress? I know some of them had period changes but never ever mentioned perimenopause.

My symptoms are O.K at the moment. TBH They've given me a kick up the bum to sort out my diet, cut down on sugar and take up some exercise. If that doesn't improve things though I will see my GP. If my periods stop totally before 45 I will print off the NICE article and ask for HRT and I'll know to push for it.

Thank You

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