Its a bit complicated with family, as always, one brother of DH, long lost adopted brother, the one who wants us to go to hawaii. The other, his full brother who he has grown up with (of sorts, he went to boarding school) is the one in NYC.
They both have toddlers within 6 months of DD, so both are great to be with in terms of family relations, DD needs to build bonds with all of her family.
However, I am thinking I am not wanting to go to hawaii to build relationships. SIL mentioned a great beach!!!
If we go to NYC, it is for family, not holiday. BIL will probably be upset if we dont spend xmas with him. Unless it was to stay at home on our tod.
But. SIL and MIL had been talking about a family xmas. So if, they both want to do Hawaii, and so do we, then I am thinking we should just try to get other brother to bring his family...and then if he wont come, its sort of his call?
However, DH had already said we would be up for an easy straightfoward xmas of going to his apartment in NYC, stay for a week, come home, no messing about organising shit.
Except that when we said all that, Hawaii had not been mentioned .
Why not ask the NY brother what he feels about going to Hawaii (assuming he's invited that is)? I think it would be lovely for you all to be together. Failing that... see if you can swing it to go via NY (either on route or on the way home).
Again... as CvQ aptly put it... I could always do Hawaii for you and be the surrogate sister
Mars - he is invited, but he is a stick in the mud. He likes to not do things that cost money, but he also likes to do not do things that involve family, its almost like not being centre of attention. He is just a misery about stuff like that. And he does not ever spend any money. Like for example, his wife is chinese, he had a chance to go to the olympic games, stay with family in Beijing - but no, he said it was a waste of money, why would he want to do that?!!!
A few years back, we went to france with DHs mum and dad, who came over fro USA for it. He did not want to go, just did not. Said it was a pain in the ass, blah blah blah.
And when we got there, he called every day, regretted it. More so, as his father died a few months after and it was the last chance for family to be together.
So, maybe we should just all go...and if he wants to come, he is invited, and if not, he can stay in the cold, in NY!!! .
I shall make a list of those in the queue to be me if I dont go, start heading up this way for entries!