Never thought it would be

[onlyone]

My husband left me this am to shack up with a family friend and her two kids.

I am gutted, crying and distraught. No shouting, screaming has ever gone on and everyone has always thought we had a good relationship and no one can believe it, neither can I.

We have had our ups and downs like any marriage.

so what happens now - how do you do the whole custody thing.

I so do not want my dc to be the outsider but know it will happen. DC adores dad and face lights up when he comes in from work. What do you say - how do you work things out.

I hurt so much it scares me and feel so sorry for my dc. I know it will get better but...

[BelleDameSansMerci]

I don't have any helpful advice for you but didn't want you to go unanswered.

You're probably in shock. Don't worry about the legal niceties etc for a couple of days at least. Be kind to yourself.

[Niceguy2]

Agree with Belle. Right now don't worry about the legalities. Look after yourself first.

As for the whole "custody" thing, at this stage just try to agree between yourselves.

[kdk]

No advice - but just want to echo what others have said - it's early days don't worry too much about what will/might happen about custody etc - just look after yourself. Sending you support and hugs ...

[thesouthsbelle]

agreed, concentrate on you and dc right now - if needed shut down to be able to do the daily things, how old are DC's?

this will get better and easier, but till a bit more time has passed just get thru each day, each hour as best you can.

[FeelingOld]

Hello Onlyone, am so sorry you are in this situation, i was exactly where you are now 2 and a half years ago and i was devasted. I lost 3 stone in weight in 3 months and didnt go to bed for a week, i found it hard to go on with life.

The advice i would give echos what others have said, for now just concentrate on getting through today, then the next and the next. Dont let anyone push you into making decisions until you are ready to do so, just agree access as and when for now, you dont have to make any formal arrangments until you and dc are ready to do so.

And the old cliche is right, in time you will be able to cope and you will be able to make decisions but for now just thing about you and dc.