Gingerbread - new campaign!

[happyhands]

Hi everyone! I'm a single mum with two little one's, my son is 6 and my daughter is 4. I was so pleased to see today that Gingerbread have launched a new campaign to stop single parents being stereotyped. How do you feel about it? You can watch the ad and sign the pledge here www.gingerbread.org.uk

[STIDW]

I don't think there is any doubt that two parents who get on together is the best for children but stereotyping single parents really hacks me off. Single parents cannot all be tarred with the same brush. They come from different backgrounds although the last time I looked a disproportionate number come from areas where there are more social, educational and emotional problems across the board anyway.

The numbers of children from separated parents who suffer poor long term outcomes is about 30% as opposed to 15% of children from intact families. That's just a 15% difference and the majority of children from broken families are fine.

When children do badly after separation the major factors are conflict between parents, poverty, the ability of parents to overcome any distress of the breakdown and multiple changes in the structure of the family. Single parents (as do both parents) need support to deal with these problems, not stereotyping.

[newyorkshire]

The Gingerbread message is good, definately a step in the right direction but not sure if it goes far enough actually [not that I am complaining].

Vanessa Feltz had a fantastic phone in on it on the radio this morning. It is shockingly dreadful how some people still think in this day and age and Gingerbread can only bring this up for discussion and help root out the evil in people who seem to begrudge and despise single parents so much for what ever their sad pathetic reasoning.

There are so many ways to make a family work and all families are different and set up in different ways with differing social factors. It's just not anyone's call to say which way is best for children. Every family has to be taken on it's own merits.

STIDW, I absolutely agree with your last paragraph about 'poverty' being a huge [probably the biggest]factor. Which only makes me wonder why the Conservatives have signed up for it. I can only assume it's for votes as they have clearly shown in the past and at present, that they are certainly not a party to support single parent families!

[gennyjones]

As a single parent I welcome this campaign by Gingerbread.

I do get fed up at times with all the stereotypes about single parents and their children and it?s about time something is done about it.

I became a single parent 6 years ago and at the same time I became redundant, my house was going to be reposed, I had a lot of debts and my self esteem was at an all time low.

I thank God that a friend of mine introduced me to Gingerbread. The help and support I received was fantastic. . Six years on, I managed to sort out my debts, I still have the house, and my self esteem is at an all time high.

I work full time as an online tutor which means I can do the school run and still take my children to their various activities.
I run part time business, and I set up a support group to help other parents with the help of Gingerbread. I also set up a project called confident children, where we run half term and holiday activities for children. Parents make a donation and we get some funding to do this.

So their are a lot of single parents who are trying to make a difference in the life of others and doing our best to raise our children the best we can.

As a mother raising boys, I do also have male role models to help me with my children. There is a lot of help and support available and I am 100% behind this campaign

[lucylue]

i welcome this message too.
but i wonder why nothing is happening for absent fathers who just disappear as if nothing happened, they didnt have any child/children? and they go on doing the same with other girls, unbelievable.
they have no responsibility feeling, they live their lives as they please, leaving mums to pick up the pieces and on top of that being stereotyped.

[gennyjones]

I agree with your point as I am in that postion. So its great as this campaign will allow us to bring all these issues out and I am sure we can get more support and Guidance from Gingerbread about this.

AS you know you are doing a great job and together we can make changes!

[Unlikelyamazonian]

I think gingerbread is hopeless.

Its website is scary and crap.

There is no branch in my area.

And no help re any nearest branch on its website.

I think it's a serious waste of space. For me anyway.

Perhaps in more affluent areas it counts for something.

As a relatively new lone parent I think its efforts are pretty shameful.

Especially given that is been going for so long.

And presumably gets some kind of tax payer funding. If doesn't it's still rubbish.

Before I became a lone parent I donated to gingerbread. I would like my money back.

Feel very strongly about this issue.

[stardust86]

If you feel that strongly why on earth don't YOU volunteer? The groups are run purely by volunteers who actively give their time to help others and provide support in their area. Sitting back and whingeing will help nothing, if you feel THAT strongly then why not do something active yourself?

Gingerbread's helpline services are excellent, they campaign tirelessly and also run a number of courses to support single parents.

[gennyjones]

Re the previous post, about Gingerbread, I would say everyone is entitled to their own opinion based on their experiences.

When an organization or indeed someone is not doing things that you feel is right, it is ok to complain but then do something about it. So you have made the first step here.

You should then express your concerns to them on why you think their services are not what you expect.

You could then, suggest ways in which you feel that they could improve their services

And for me, there wasn?t a group where I lived, I decided to do something about it, by staring a friendship group where I have made new friends and we are all learning and growing together. I must say Gingerbread has been a lifeline to me

Please take one positive action today and make a difference!

[Unlikelyamazonian]

Mmm actually that's a good idea! I just don't have the time at the moment. When ds is a bit older and at school, maybe it's something I should do. For me, Homestart, Surestart, HV, CAB and other such people have been a big help.

Support from a charity would perhaps have felt less 'official'and therefore scary iykwim. Bt as I say, zilch Gingerbread around these parts.

Will serioulsy consider the idea of setting a branch up.

[Niceguy2]

I guess its stereotypes like this Gingerbread is trying to fight.

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1253635/Quarter-mothers-single-parents-enticed-ben efits-lifestyle-choice.html