Christmas advice please

[SingleMum01]

I've been divorced for 5 years and love Christmas - apart from having to put up with the miserable ex visiting Christmas morning and sitting on my sofa with a face on!

Do you think I could get away with saying we won't be home at Christmas and for him to see my DS Christmas eve instead? I don't think it will matter to my DS.

He used to see his other kids Christmas eve and not Christmas day.

Am I being mean? It ruins my Christmas the thought of him turning up.

[SingleMum01]

PS - just to let you know our circumstances. He sees our DS for 2 hours each Sunday - his choice, I would willingly let him see him more or let him stay at my ex's. However, my ex just wants the easy playing at dad for a couple of hours a week without any hassle. He doesn't pay any maintenance - pleads poverty all the time, doesn't take our DS anywhere just to his house to play on the computer. Oh dear, I sound bitter!

[ChasingSquirrels]

If you don't want him there don't invite him / tell him he isn't welcome this year.

[AboardtheAxiom]

In your situation where he doesn't pay you anything towards the upkeep of his son, and only bothers with him for a couple of hours a week I would simply say to him you have reassessed things and would prefer him to see him xmas eve or boxing day. Perfectly reasonable in your situation IMO.

Don't lie and say you are going out though. Just say, "I have been thinking about xmas and would prefer you to see DS either xmas eve or boxing day rather than xmas day itself, which would you prefer?"

[SingleMum01]

Thanks I know he'll have a face on if I tell him that, but he'll have a face on either way, at least he won't piss me off on Christmas day.

[ChocHobNob]

Perhaps suggest he has your son on Boxing Day for a couple of hours and emphasise how much he will love having two Christmases?