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I wish my mum would STOP saying that she thinks Dd1 will end up wanting to live with xp

(3 Posts)
MrsMorgan Sun 25-Oct-09 14:49:46

She says it every now and again, usually when me and dd are not getting on, and it really pisses me off.

Dd1 is nearly 12 and behaves like a typical preteen, nice one minute and a brat full of attitude the next. We have always clashed, thats just the way we are.

My mum keeps going on about that she thinks dd will end up wanting to live with her dad. I can see where she is coming from, as I am the one dishing out all the rules and punishments, and xp does nothing and so it might be seen as an attractive option. However, he lives in a 1 bed flat, and never does anything with the dc at all and so they are always bored when they go there.

When my parents divorced, I fought like never before to be allowed to live with my dad and in the end I won and my brothers also stayed with him. I think in an odd way my mum is hoping that dd does do this so that I will know how she felt. I know she hasn't ever forgiven me for choosing my dad.

Also my mum thinks I am totally nuts because I said that if dd ever did decide this, as gutted as I would be, I would not stop her, and my reason for that is because my mum made my life hell when I told her I wasn't going to be living with her, and i'd never do that to dd.

I just wish she'd shut up about it.

thesunshinesbrightly Sun 25-Oct-09 15:01:42

I agree, am sure she is still hurt about you wanting too live with your dad and she will never get over it, must of been so hurtful.

I also agree with you about not stopping your DD.

I dont really have any advice, bu i am sure someone will be along soon.

MaggieMonday Tue 03-Nov-09 09:25:31

That's awful. A lot of history going on there. I feel sorry for your mum though. Maybe if you say to her that you do realise how hard that must have been for her, she'll back off a bit.

The next time, look your mum straight in the eye and say that if that happens, it'd be devastating, but you'd rather lose her temporarily than to stand back and allow her to turn into a total brat who has no respect for you.

EVEN if she went to live with her Dad for a bit, you'd still be her mother, and when the teenage mist evaporated, nothing would ever take that away from you.

What does your mum want?

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