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Really down about my prospects at the moment.

(9 Posts)
poshsinglemum Tue 20-Oct-09 19:57:46

I mean my dating prospects and career prospects.
I jsut feel finished.

My dd is very young (1 year old) and I am a SAH single mum and have yeyt to go back to work.

Everyone tells you to enjoy the early years and I am but I am so down that I am doing it alone. I always thought I would be married when I had kids.

i feel liek I have given up on love. Everyone else has someone apart from me. Perhaps I did something wrong in a past life/ I am in love with someone who has a girlfriend. I have known him for years but afte isn't on my side. Anyone else is second best.

DD is at taht age when I can't even go to the loo let alone on a much needed night on the tiles and I just really miss my old life.

I can't even go out and dance to forget my sorrows and I have no money.

I don't think I am that depressed and sometimes I love being a mum but doing it alone is so hard on so many levels.

poshsinglemum Tue 20-Oct-09 19:59:22

fate.

Sorry about bad spelling.

Whats so frustrating is that I can't even get out there and find someone new.

I think some of my girlfriends feel comfortable as I am unlucky in love.

TheWheelsOnTheBusHaveFallenOff Tue 20-Oct-09 20:03:14

hey there. I'm sorry for how you're feeling right now. I am on my own with a pre-schooler too and it is so hard isn't it. Some days I can live with the thought that I just have to tread water for the early years and think about getting back on track when he's at school or a bit older and I have a bit more time for retraining / taking on work / feeling like I have more than 3 brain cells - but other days I am climbing the walls and don't see how I can last another week let alone a couple more years! I think the trick is just trying to find something else to occupy your mind with - good series on TV, books, chatting to friends ... anything that allows you to lose yourself for a few minutes or more.

poshsinglemum Tue 20-Oct-09 20:06:53

I know that non single mums find it hard too. i'm just trying to keep optomistic and count my blessings.

TheWheelsOnTheBusHaveFallenOff Tue 20-Oct-09 20:13:06

well yes everyone with a small child finds it hard - but being on your own and having to do the whole shebang, looking after them, yourself, the house etc - it is knackering and there's no harm in venting a bit here.

I do the optimistic thing too, in many ways I know I'm lucky, but doesn't stop me feeling sorry for myself every now and again!

have you tried internet dating? you can do that for free and while it's not the same as getting out on the dance floor it is a way back in to the dating scene.

poshsinglemum Tue 20-Oct-09 20:46:01

I will do but I need to get over this guy first. I love him dearly so I am finding it hard to moove on. Everyone thinks that he likes me too but just can't afford to rock the boat which makes it harder for me. A lot of regrets.

ninah Tue 20-Oct-09 21:16:57

you are not finished
your life will change so much as dd gets older, being single has lots of pluses - I know some unhappily married friends envy my life (the fools)
There is not only one man in the world for you, it's a matter of temperament and timing - and whatever you think your life is going to change
Let's face it we can choose to be unhappy, or happy in most situations
Not everyone else is happily coupled up. Anyway,what matters is you
IT GETS BETTER!

poshsinglemum Tue 20-Oct-09 23:06:23

Thanks you too.

I know I will get over him. i was so happy before he came back on the scene. Just goes to show taht being single can be good.

DutchGirly Wed 21-Oct-09 09:56:29

Poshsinglemum,

Where do you live? It may help to get out with other mums, even if it is to the park or go for a cup of tea.

I am sure there are plenty of mums in the same situation where you live, single or not.

I am a single mum and I would love to meet with other mums just for a chat and cup of tea, complete with baby/toddler in tow.

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