This has really hit me in the last few weeks but I think I might really miss my XP (well the good times)...
Well not really sure as our relationship was mostly and increasingly bad towards the end of the 4 years. He grew more and more aggressive towards me - threats etc as he said I was a nag - and really was not pulling his weight financially.
Objectively he sounds pretty rubbish but he was so sweet when we first met and is a very charismatic person.
I am fine coping with the 2 kiddies by myself - 8 months and 3 years - they are lovely kids and my family help out regularly.
I am also lucky financially to be able to cope without my XP (he does not contribute - no suprise there as he was always bad with money).
We disagree a lot about contact - as he doesnt want to give me notice re seeing kids and just wants to turn up when suits him
Emotionally I dont feel very independent though,,,,Not sure why I miss him given what I said above. Guess still a bit in love as he is father of my kids maybe? Just finished breastfeeding little one so maybe hormones?
Is this normal? anyone else have a similar eexperience and if so how did you get over it?
In the 6 months apart we had a couple of dalliances which probably doesnt help....he just goes back to shouting at me a few days later if i say something that upsets him.
Gosh reading this you must think I am a doormat. I am not generally but feel sorry for my XP as bad childhood etc.
Any advice welcome....be as blunt as you like.
Cheers my dears
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6 months down the line and feel very lonely without XP :(
15 replies
northlondonmumma · 05/10/2009 22:08
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