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Can I just ask?

(4 Posts)
wirral Mon 31-Aug-09 06:59:00

For advice. I'm a single parent with 9 year old daughter. I've just started to work about 2 hours trave away - 4 hours round trip. The job's enjoyable but is difficult to manage with child as well.

Daughter's been at her Dad's for last fortnight. Was due to come home today then go back to ex's for another day. Then to my parents as I'm working away for the rest of week.

I've been really looking forward to her coming home. Last night she texted me to ask if she could bring her friend home for day. I explained that a bit short notice, I've not planned for friend and that I had arranged day ending with meal with family. So No. Daugther has now decided to stay at her Father's as no fun here.

Am so disappointed. My Dad says it's my fault as I've taken on too much with this job. Also he says I drink too much and my friend (femle) is around here too much.

Am not in a good place at the moment.

TinyPawz Mon 31-Aug-09 14:52:43

Oh dear....

That is not very nice of your father to say those things. You need/want to work toprovide for your daughter and you also need company. I don;t see what his problem is with either of those things. I can't comment on the drinking too much, only you can answer that for yourself.

I suppose your DD has gotten used to having her friend for the 2 weeks and is a bit reluctant to leave her, but I would imagine that she would have been looking forward to seeing you.

You are the adult and you probably should have put your foot down in regards to her 'staying' with her dad. Does/will she think that if she does get her own way that it is ok to do want she wants ie stay there and not come home to you?

mamas12 Mon 31-Aug-09 15:02:22

Sorry you're feeling bad about this.
I agree with tiny you should put your foot down and say these are the arrangemnets darling and I'm so looking forward to seeing you. You are in charge okay.

wirral Mon 31-Aug-09 16:14:06

Ah but I'm not in charge. She's with her Dad.He's more than happy for her to stay. Short of driving round ad dragging her home I have no option other than to go with it. To make matters worse I'm away with work all this week so that means that I won't have seen her for 3 weeks.

Had pretty miserable day - even watching Jermey Kyle hasn't made me feel more normal.

Thanks for the comments. Will spend week away with work and see what transpires

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