(30 Posts)
nannyj Wed 26-Aug-09 20:06:53

Went to the Post Office today to use their check and send service and the lady behind the counter was quite rude and said i needed to fill in the fathers details because of course i knew them.

Now i do know his details we are still friends but i just don't want his details on my dd's passport. He's not on the birth certificate so don't see why he needs to be on passport. Was so gobsmacked to be honest i just went out but am still angry . She doesn't know my circumstances i could have been raped or not known his details.

Have just talked to a friend who is also a lone parent and she didn't put the fathers details on and said post office lady is talking bollocks!

Am going back but want to be armed so what is the answer? Did anyone else need the fathers details on?

GypsyMoth Wed 26-Aug-09 20:11:13

yes. and recently too. it ewas sent back to me. the form says clearly those are needed as well as both sets of grandparents details. ours ended up having to be redone completely,countersiniture,the lot!!

so be careful.....his details wont even be on the passport.

mothergoingmad Thu 27-Aug-09 01:46:14

Hi How dare some post office worker be so rude! Who soes she think she is to judge you!

I got passports for both of my dcs last year and did not have to put the useless excuse of a mans details on the forms.

I have parental responsibility for my dcs (so does he) but I was told only one of us needed to apply for passports and didn;t need the other parents details.

I had a problem as I changed my dc's Surname by deed poll prior to HIM obtaining joint parental responsibility and they wanted to see proof of his consent to the change of name. It took me ages to get throught to them that I didn't need his permission as PR was not in place for him at the time of the change. Once that was sorted there was not a problem.

I like you did not want HIS details on my dcs passports.

If your x is not even on the birth Certificate surely he has no legal rights over the child and therefore you do not need to put his details on the forms.

I hope you get it sorted.

steaknife Thu 27-Aug-09 08:08:13

Link to passport page on govt site

But I am not sure if that answers your question completely. Did the application come with any guideline documents that might help?

passport service helpline number 0300 222 0000

nannyj Thu 27-Aug-09 09:17:49

Thanks for that. I just am so annoyed really, in every way i'm a lone parent and he isn't involved and will be soon moving back to his home country on the other side of the world so won't have contact. There are no bad feelings but i just don't want him on the system and because he's not British i'll need his parents names and date of mnarriage. I don't even know their names its ridiculous.

But she needs a passport.....Am tempted to put father unknown blush. This is the first time i've EVER had to put his name on anything.

steaknife Thu 27-Aug-09 13:24:13

I would definately phone and check with the passport people. But if he isn't named on the birth certificate then I wouldn't see why he would need to be named on the passport.
If he is then it might be problematic.

I hate paperwork - I've just had to do all our benefit papers and hated XDH a little bit more every-time I had to put "single" instead of "married"

lal123 Thu 27-Aug-09 13:47:41

Are you married to father? anyway this might help - think it says that father doesn't need to sign/be included.

oldraver Fri 28-Aug-09 11:00:15

No use phoning them the 'helpline' dont know themselves.
I applied for my DS's passport last year and I do know most of his fathers details but couldn't remember where he was born (somewhere obscure to where he lived as no maternity hospital where he lived) and I wasnt sure if I should put 'half' the details down.

I phoned the helpline and got an Indian call center. I explained I the father wasnt on the birth certificate so should I still write down the details I had. I was told by the male call centre operative to ... 'get your husband to fill in the form'. I had to ask several times as I was a) stunned he would say that and b) not sure he had understood my very simple question. I did get a bit ranty annoyed and tell him that he was assuming I actually HAD a husband (I didnt go down the route of er he's dead but there you go ). I got to speak to a supervisor as the guy couldn't understand that you could have a child and NOT be married. That aside even if I was married I dont need my 'husbands' help or permission to fill in a form. I did eventually phone back and got someone in this country and she couldnt tell me either if they needed the fathers details. She did apologise for how the other call had been handled and I know wish I had taken it further but all I was interested in at the time was getting the blasted passport

I suppose it all depends on your circumstances. I would assume if they're no details on BC ie no PR for the father then there is no point on having his details on the application

nannyj Fri 28-Aug-09 14:07:29

Thanks for all your replies. Am not married to him, got pregnant very early on in the relationship which wasn't serious anyway. There are no bad feelings but i am very much a single parent and he has no input at all. What i find hard is that i'm not allowed to put him on the birth certificate but must include him on a passport!

I may put George Clooney instead wink. When the "lovely" post office lady said well of course you know who the father is i should have said at the top of my voice well actually i don't, it could be a number of men! Wish i was a bit more mouthy. grin

oldraver Fri 28-Aug-09 23:41:38

I would go back and if she says anything tell her you have consulted the Passport office and they have confirmed that you dont have to include the fathers details. You could add if you want (but I would not be inclined to justify myself to a nosey biddy) "as only I have PR"

It seems from the previous replies it could go either way, though I didnt have to provide GP's details like Ilivetiffany but thats because I'm an old bird

RedHairedGirlie Sat 29-Aug-09 08:18:14

I got my 5 month old daughters passport about a month ago, didn't use the quick service but I most definitely did not put the fathers details down and had no problems.. the only issue I had was that the picture of her didn't originally satisfy their requirements.. all sorted though.

Bellsa Sat 29-Aug-09 08:37:04

Make a rude and insensitive! I applied for ds' 4 years ago and used the service where you go to the office in London (v v disorganised me!). I don't remember being asked anything at all, and certainly didn't provide his details. If you don't have to provide them for a birth certificate then I'm sure you don't for a passport.

hatesponge Sat 29-Aug-09 08:50:42

I got DS1's passport about 3 years ago. I didnt put down any info about his father, who is not on his birth certificate. I don't remember there being any problems other than that we left it to the last minute & had to go to the London office like Bellsa From memory, I was told the main reason for putting the details down is nationality etc - ie if you as mum were not British, you need all that stuff re the dad to show that he is, and that therefore your DC is entitled to a British passport. But obviously if you're British, and theres only you on the birth certificate, it shouldnt really matter.

I sympathise entirely though - years and years ago, when I was on benefits for about 6 weeks before returning to work after DS1 was born,I had a run in with the Benefits Agency who insisted I give them DS1's dad's address. I said I didnt have it, and got the response 'Oh, you obviously didnt know him very well then' shockangry That was more than 10 years ago, & I still havent quite calmed down!

Niceguy2 Sat 29-Aug-09 10:58:13

Personally I would just put the father's name on and be done with it! There's more to worry about in life than making problems where there are none.

As for those who suggest complaining, get a grip!!

StewieGriffinsMom Sat 29-Aug-09 12:26:28

Message withdrawn

floatyjosmum Sun 30-Aug-09 17:13:48

in got my 2 passports in 06 so things may have changed,
dd dads details went on as we get on well etc and gave him it to fill in, he's also on birth cert which i had to send with it.
for ds passport i didnt put anything on the dad bit, knopw all of his dads details but didnt want to ask him for passport number! he isnt on the birth cert and there were no questions asked. both passports came back at same time so it didnt take them any longer to do

Linnet Sun 30-Aug-09 17:23:18

I never use their check and send service, you are paying them just to check that everything is in the envelope. I just check it's all there and send it.

And I wouldn't have thought that you'd have to put down the fathers details if you didn't want to.

ProdigalMomma Tue 23-Mar-10 17:15:03

Hi - found this topic as I'm in similar position... got mine (I need a renewal) and the 'mini fairy's' photos done this morning - she was a perfect angel about it so hoping the photo is okayed!

I'm going to go ahead and leave the "Father" & those sorts of details; he IS on the birth certificate, but I have no current address for him... good riddance as he was *not very kind*

It's upsetting that she legally has his name though

Will try the local check & send tomorrow; it's a village and know both of us - so keep fingers crossed for us please!

Lomond Tue 23-Mar-10 17:24:44

Hi ProdigalMomma, just wanted to let you know that I got my DD a passport last week (i'm in Scotland) I didn't include and details of her father as we are no longer together. That is even though he has joint parental responsibility as his name is on her birth certificate. I wasn't asked any questions about him and the passport came through fine.

Good luck with yours!

Lomond Tue 23-Mar-10 17:26:00

Sorry I should have added that my dd has her fathers surname which is different from mine.

returningstress Tue 23-Mar-10 17:33:00

My dd had her passport done about a year and a half ago, and her fathers details and not on the passport or her birth cert.

And I had no problems at the post office...

DD has my surname.

ProdigalMomma Tue 23-Mar-10 19:21:54

thanks Lomond and returningstress... feel a bit more confidant about tomorrow's attempt now - my 'sensible' head tells me all will be well, but the usual 'what if' thoughts do creep in... ridiculous really, this topic only goes to show I'm not alone in my situation!

VKschmeekay Tue 23-Mar-10 19:51:33

I am watching this thread as I have to get a new passport for DS due to a surname change by Deed Poll.

I am sure for the original PP that I never gave the fathers details but cannot remember 100%.

I thought it might be of note though, particularly to others like Lomond that if your DC have the fathers name and not yours that immigration are likely to ask lots of questions about whether your DC are yours or not. I got stopped and made to feel like a child trafficker as DS doesn't have my surname and I didn't have his birth certificate or a letter from his father allowing me to take him abroad!!!!

Hence, I am getting him a new PP before the 5 years runs out to shoe his name change by deed poll to now include my surname.

Going back to the OP - that was very rude and upsetting. She could have been more tactful and if she is doing a checking service, she should know what she is doing!!

Vistana Sun 28-Mar-10 14:42:34


Just found this post how did it go? Did you have any problems?

My bump's father is going to be unknown *complete ahole and so am concerned I am going to have problems with legal paperwork throughtout.
(but really isn't worth the hassle of fighting him for a name on the birth cert as we're better off without him).

Back to OP that women is a disgrace to the post office no wonder people don't use post offices much these days if you can by passs rudeness by doing things online etc!

talie101 Mon 29-Mar-10 17:34:18

Fathers details do not show up on passports.

Put the fathers name down and on the page where there is a box for any further information just put 'further details of father unknown' - I was advised to do this by the person at the end of the helpline and had no problems reapplying for dc's passports - unsure if procedure different for a 'first' passport.

It's annoying what you have to do and don't do but can you imagine it the other way round if the non-resident parent could get a passport for your dc's without any questions?!!! How scary would that be!

PS - don't bother with check and send, like other poster said, complete waste of money! Just make sure you've filled in everything you can.

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