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How do you keep fighting for your DC's? I just dont know if i have any more fight!! -

(6 Posts)
easytosay Mon 17-Aug-09 13:42:55

I guess this is a little cry for help.

Since splitting with my ex three months ago i thought that things would finally get better. The abuse would stop and the children would be happy, safe and know that they are loved.

Instead i am finding my family are being ripped apart.

My ex continues to throw nasty comments at me when dd is dropped off. I get called anything from a fat lazy bitch to a c**t all in front of dd.

Ex's strange behaviour ranges from changing dd's clothes as soon as he gets her to his mothers house to getting his brother to hide in bushes to check that i have driven away after drop off. All sounds silly and childish really doesnt it?

Well now i have discovered that he is poisoning dd's mind. He tells her he hates me, tells her over and over again that mummy hurts you and then makes her repeat it all back to him. This has now resulted in ex getting social services involved. While they should just see through all this bitterness they havent. Infact, i have received a phone call to tell me that dd has disclosed that mummy has hurt her and i am now to be interviewed by the police. I am falling apart. I just dont think i can cope any more.

I also have my ds who doesnt have to see ex and a full time job to hold down. I cant afford to fall apart.

I just dont know what to do. Will the police believe these lies? How can i prove they are lies? How can i stay strong when day after day i am being kicked left right and centre. I just dont know how to keep going on!

sincitylover Mon 17-Aug-09 15:49:52

God didn't want to leave your post unanswered but not sure how I can help.

This sounds terrible. Your ex sounds vile.

Can't believe social services can't see through this but I suppose they have to follow procedures.

I would say you must have someone else with you when being interviewed by police. Hopefully someone with more knowledge will be along soon.

hayley2u Mon 17-Aug-09 15:58:47

oh my goodness, he sound like a prat and a half. i would speak to someone as this is obviously tearig you up, speak to a dotor as they will think about u and then tell you who to get in touch with then , have someelse who an meet him for the kids to be picked up n dropped off, and if he keeps acting like this, he will hance having less contact with them anyway, is he a young dadf he dont have sound childish anyway, u shud never slag each other off in front of your children, but the children will soonrealise ur there mother and your a good mother xxxxx

easytosay Mon 17-Aug-09 16:49:49

Thankyou for your support. I always have some one else with me when i do the hand overs and they have also heard this language but because they are family members they just dont seem to be listend to. They are being told that they are biased as they are relatives.

This all hurts so much. I just want to close my eyes and wish it all away.

I love my children so much and they are my hope for my future but i can feel them slipping away from me.

GypsyMoth Mon 17-Aug-09 17:05:45

is there court orders here? assume not as its only 3 months since the split. what are access arrangements at present? would he be doing this to gain residency,or to just continue hurting you?

go to stacks and stacks of advice on their forum. look under residency/children/court.

how old is your dd? alot of questions,but just want to help you.

notevenamousie Mon 17-Aug-09 18:01:58

How incredibly horrible for you...

I've not had anything that bad. Do you have freinds or family to talk to? Sound slike you need some real life belief - though I/we believe you you need to really hear it from people you love.

I suggest you keep notes of everything, go and see your GP, and keep doing the wonderful job with your dc. I would not be surprised if you "fell apart" - I hope that SS will see the truth. Men can be so vindictive, I am sorry I am no help but I am thinking of you and so willing to help and listen and please CAT me if you need an ear.

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