agree contact is beneficial so long as it is safe.
perhaps if an ex has managed to be abusive only out of earshot/view of the children then you could argue it was nothing to do with the children...sadly i would not think that its the case. further, the stress caused to the "victim" has impact on the children if they are unable to parent as effectively as they would like due to stress...
of course some women may claim abuse etc - sometimes abuse is in the eye of the victim...
in my case, my ex was cautioned for assault and criminal damage which took place in front of the children - not sure if that meets the "committed a criminal offence" criteria?
a lot of what he did was reported by me eg to social worker but ultimately my word against his.... if you werent there at the time it maybe doesnt sound so bad - and there are always two ways to report a football game/fight/argument - depending on who you support/believe....
certainly a future wife of his might suggest I have made it up, who knows... i would like to think he has learned from whatever therapy/anger management he has attended and has reformed for any future relationship...lucky her! or maybe she would just be someone who is able to set the boundaries at the beginning and stamp on behaviour at the first sign...who knows.
anyway, i have mixed feelings, certainly CAFCASS appeared to totally udnerstand my poitn of view but after more meetings with my ex, appear to almost ignore my concerns - he can be very manipulative... i keep on sending them his ranting emails to me - but of course the emails are not directed at the children so it doesnt matter doest it?? anyway, we did get supervised ocntact ordered which is safe for all and protects the children - and ultimately the ex in a way...
you can read this which talks about risk to children from "batterers" - pick out bits relevatnt to your situation and rewrite them to suit. i agree term "batterer" is somewhat unfortunate but it means an abusive ex who has been abusive...
www.lundybancroft.com/art_risk_children.html
but you have no choice, CACASS must be invovled, provide evidence, diaries, logs, reprots of childrens behviour after seeing him etcetc.
you need to be couching everything in terms of the children and their needs and wishes - eg the fact my six yr old d said clearly to CAFCASS officer she was scared to be with daddy on her own, without another adult present, in case he got "distressed" again and smashed things up etc. .
the separated fatehr/mothers who have killed their children were often reported to be "good fathers", who "loved their children". too often the concerns of the otehr parent are not taken into account.
watch the dispatches programme -
the children betrayed - the excerpts on family court system.... not the baby p/victoria cimbie - but the ones given unsupervised access depsite "claims" of domestic violence/abuse and concerns of the other parent.
sure - assess the claims of the parent, seek psych reports if you like - (i will happily put myself forward!) but take it seriously...
www.channel4.com/programmes/dispatches/episode-guide/series-31/episode-1
Almost 10 years after the death of Victoria Climbié, Dispatches investigates the failures still present in Britain's child protection system. With a child being killed by their parent or carer every seven days in the UK, and over 160 child killings since 2004, journalist Peter Oborne examines how such horrific murders might be prevented in the future.
The death of Baby Peter in 2007 focussed attention on the failures of social services but as Dispatches demonstrates, the failures in child protection reach beyond the realms of just social work departments to include police forces, health services and - as one mother claims - even the family court system.