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Feeling Lonely

(16 Posts)
Louise1980 Sun 01-May-05 14:58:59

I just nead a whinge!

Today is one of the days I hate. We've been to a christening and while every1 else seemed to have a partner I was there with my sister and the kids. Im sick of hearing about peoples partners and all the things they do together.

I dont I want another parent for the boys but sometimes it would be nice to have someone for me. I feel lonely today. really lonely. It would be nice to have a night out with someone other than the girls. I want to feel special and loved again. A cuddle would be sooo nice.

I really want to just sit here and cry today. Whats worse is when people who hav partners say Im lucky coz Im alone. They dont know how lonely I feel!

Does anyone else ever feel like this? I

gothicmama Sun 01-May-05 15:02:39

awww- here's a cyber hug but probably not what you need I think everyone with or without a partner feels like that soemtimes

Louise1980 Sun 01-May-05 15:25:19

Thanks gothicmama. Feel really guilty now cause kids saw me crying now I feel selfish for putting me before them.

tammybear Sun 01-May-05 15:28:46

even though we always put our kids first, you need to think of yourself too. i feel a lot like you. i just sometimes want a guy to take me out and give me a hug, and not be committed to him in a relationship. ive been out with a guy a couple of times, but hes got it in his head i want committment from him, not that i ever once said that i do.

Louise1980 Sun 01-May-05 15:38:46

I find men either think single mothers want long term commitment and they are to take on your kids, marry you and do your decorating. OR they think that you wil willingly let them use you for sex while they have a string of other women to then settle down with none of the above. Is there no middle bit?

I dont want any man to interfere with my children, nor do I want to be used. I just want to "court" some1 as my grandma calls it!

gothicmama Sun 01-May-05 15:40:18

don't feel guilty you need some me time -

Louise1980 Sun 01-May-05 15:41:45

Im so tempted to phone my "bed friend" but then it will just be sex and I dont want that tonight.

prettyfly1 Sun 01-May-05 16:17:33

hey sweet,

not perhaps a good idea - sounds like you want companionship more then a shag. I do know how you feel though. I am about to give birth to my first ds on my own and was in hospital recently and it wasnt fun to watch all the excited daddies and new grandparents coming in and out. It does get lonely. I dont know how you make it go away and i actually posted about it at the time - what i will say is that i guess that we will meet someone eventually and probably be better partners because we know we can make it on our own and be our own people - plus you sound like a very caring mum who really puts her kids first so i hope you meet someone lovely who treats you well soon!!!

Dont know if that helps but did want to say we were thinking of you!!

honeypot01 Sun 01-May-05 17:31:44

Hi Louise

I know how u feel, all happy families everywhere! All the nice guys are taken where are there any decent single guys???!! It will get better think we all have our low days, you'll find that so many couples that seem happily married, arent, they're jus together for the kids, i know lots like that. my mates husband even said it to her!!! Hi Prettyfly how u today?

Louise1980 Sun 01-May-05 17:52:01

Thanks its good to know although Im lonely Im not alone!

weesaidie Sun 01-May-05 18:05:13

Hey Louise1980

I know how you feel! The worst thing is I think I have become a reltionship/commitment phobic!

I have a new man and he has invited me round and I could go but don't really want too! He is lovely but I just don't think he is right for me!

How awful is that??

Louise1980 Sun 01-May-05 18:32:01

I do that! I find excuses not to meet them etc and my mates practically force me in to it then I either get all clingy n scare them off or look for problems and arguments so they dump me!

DeadorAlive Wed 04-May-05 02:45:41

I have NEVER felt so lonely as I have at times these past few weeks...and I've been slated (quite rightly) on my previous post because the guy I am SOOO tempted to get more involved with (because of the much needed hugs - albeit mostly virtual - and attention and affection blah blah) is not, or rather should not be, available.

It's so bloody unfair that I fall for this guy and I apologise if this offends anyone because I'm not able to be ever so strong and just 'stop' having feelings because I now know he's married. I know from my previous post I'm unlikely to get much sympathy for what I'm feeling but it is so very, very hard to have what you've craved for so long finally offered on a plate that you can't eat from!

Louise1980 Wed 04-May-05 15:40:10

I know that and I dont condem (is that the right word?) you for that. I have been out with married men on occasions. Tsk tsk, Im ashamed of it now and I never split any families up.

All I will say to you is if hes with you while he's with someone else whe will be with someone else when he's with you.

The person I want most right now is about 200 miles away and Ive never met him. Its just an online thing. Is that bad?

DeadorAlive Wed 04-May-05 21:54:56

No, it's not bad. For all the exciting things the net can do for us good old fashioned feelings still get in the way, and it plays havoc with your head cos they're too far away!!

I recently had a bereavement and the one person I wanted for comfort was a friend in the US (we had got back in touch via Friends Reuinted and talked every day on MSN). I wanted a hug from him so much and all you can do is be satisfied with the virtual cup of tea and 'biggest hug ever'...but I know how much it was 'meant' and could almost feel it!

I don't chat online (apart from old friend in US) but I have lots of female friends that do and you'll often hear people say 'get a life' or 'go get some real friends'...but these so called impersonal ways of communicating are often VERY open, honest and personal, more so than in real life, so maybe you get closer, feelings emerge and then the hard bit starts because you've covered more ground than you would by meeting them in the pub but they're not accessible!

Your life becomes ruled by emails and texts!

Are you able to get together with this person at all? I think it's very sweet and I really feel for you.

Someone should market those furry hugs from the soup adverts then we could sit with them round our shoulders while typing or texting!!!

Louise1980 Thu 05-May-05 17:51:10

lol. I coud use a fury hug!
There is a chance we could meet but Im so wary of men right now anyway that Im convinced that Im not the only one he's chatting to!

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