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Dcs meeting the OW today. I feel sick.

(4 Posts)
Leslaki Sat 25-Oct-08 14:27:06

XH left in march for this woman. her behaviour so far is pretty bad - I had to report her to the police for harrassment (she has hounded me with texts wanting to be my friend as well as bizarre texts preetending to be called Tony and expressing undying love for me hmm ). before I knew about her and xh she invited herself along to ds's birthday party (WTF????) - I'd only met her once before BTW - she worked with xh. XH introduces her to people as 'the new Leslaki'!! Then later on I find out that she has bought DD (4) a Monsoon handbag and told her to keep it secret from mummy!!! DD was upset when I saw the bloody bag and asked whre she got it from! The day after ds's birthday DD announced to me that Donna was daddy's girlfriend! Donna also developed a bit of an unhealthy obsession, even pushing MIL and my mate out the way to help her with her shoes at DS' party!!! Anyway that was all back in Feb. She recently got a police warning for the harassment and both my kids are upset at the thought of meeting her. She has been living with XH since we split up in march but he has lied to the kids and I about where he was living - told DD he was sleeping rough in his car FGS cos mummy wouldn't let him in the house! DD has had sleepless nights worrying about her daddy and worrying about Donna being daddys girlfriend. Anyway a few weeks ago I made XH take the kids to his house as I felt DD really needed to see that daddy was living in a nice house and not a car. he finally agreed but Donna wasn't there. I had to ask him to look after DS on Monday night for 1 hour as he was ill and I had to go out for 30 mins (DD at rainbows) and it as agreed that Donna wouldn't be there as not fair on ill ds (6). Anyway she bloody well turned up. DS very upset after wards. both kids up during the night having bad dreams about meeting Donna - they def don't want to. I've tried telling them that mummy doesn't mind if they lke Donna - trying to give them permission to like her as I don't want them carrying adult's burdens IYSWIM. They went to X's last night for a slepover and it had been previously agreed that she wouldn't be there. then she announced she would be - I put my foot down as dd freaked. X promised to speak to kids and not pressure them. Anyway he phoned today, said kids have asked to meet bloody Donna and are bouncing about with happiness cos they are wit him and meeting her! Told me they are unhappy with me!(he was a crap dad when we were tog - DS has said he is happier now as he spends good time with his dad and I think he is scared that will end when he has to share daddy with OW)etetc. So they are meeting her. She is manipulative and I know thye are not ready. He is atking them away for 5 days this week and I asked him to leave the intro till afterthen to gradually buld her up to them, dropping her name into conversations etc, humanising her so she's not introduced to them straight after his BIG TALK about her. But no. they are meeting her today and I feel sick. Sorry for rant. I know there's nothing I can do. I accept they will ahve to meet her but wanted it to be made easy for them. DS said yesterday that he knows he will have to meet her to keep daddy happy and so daddy doesn't stop loving him sad. X is very biased towards dd. My poor wee kids. Sorry for naging on. I probably sound like a sad old cow!

tryingtocookacurry Sat 25-Oct-08 14:32:14

she sounds awful - poor you! Let's hope she has grown up a bit (she sounds very childish) and that your children have a nice day.

citronella Sat 25-Oct-08 14:45:03

Oh dear! How agonising. You do not sound like a sad old cow at all just a mum who anxious to protect her children from more disruption to their lives than necessary or that they might be able to cope with.
Are they back with you this evening?

Leslaki Sat 25-Oct-08 14:55:58

Yes thank god. I'm at work till 5 so will get them at half past. Just sitting here wondering how it will go. DD said yesterday that she knows Donna will buy her things and be nice to her to make DD like her. sad Thing is, she will buy her things and dd will want the things so she'll be all confused. Think it'll be big cuddles and Pjs on to watch X factor under a blanket together tonight - a no pressure together type of evening. Hope they're ok...

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