I'm sure he has a personality disorder. We have small DDs and share their care so we have to co-parent. I don't know if I can do it. In the last year since we split he has reported me to children's services about 8 times (they are, I think, quite sick of him but they have to investigate), he has reported me to the police, he has been awful about handing over DDs, going back on his word and keeping them for longer than agreed (this has now stopped due to a recent court order). I am starting to see how abusive our marriage was, how he totally fucked with my mental health. He tried to convince me that I had a personality disorder, then tried to convince me that I was autistic. He never actively stopped me seeing my friends but he would engineer situations to make it impossible (e.g. always flake on the childcare at the last minute and I would have to cancel or bring DC along). Financially he was completely in control of everything and very mean with it. Since splitting he has been financially abusive towards me. Since we have split he has damaged my things, hidden them, said he doesn't have them when I know he does (he has remained at what was the family home). He is just awful. How do I move forward and co-parent with someone like this for the next 13 years? Without going totally crazy in the process? Any decision we have to agree on, he disagrees with me on principle. He would argue that the sky is green just for the sake of it. He writes long, rambling emails when just a few lines would do. He keeps me deliberately out of the loop for e.g. dentist appointments then delights in telling me I have missed a check up. He refuses to use mutual friends or family as intermediaries. He refuses to use a communication book, I tried this and he ended up refusing to give it back. I am just so overwhelmed and feel very despondant 😭 I almost feel like letting the DDs live with him all the time, because then I wouldn't have to see him or interract with him (I wouldn't actually do this). Please tell me it gets easier??
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