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If you are separated it divorced do you ever wished you’d stayed for practical reasons

(12 Posts)
Lardlizard Wed 16-Dec-20 17:46:47

Like you know how some people sort of emotionally separate but stay together but end up living kinda separate lives

OP’s posts: |
OneRingToRuleThemAll Wed 16-Dec-20 17:47:58

No. You will be stuck in a limbo with one foot in and one foot out. Draw a line under it and move on.

bookishtartlet Wed 16-Dec-20 21:24:37

I hate sharing my son, I wish things had been different. I'm only 5 months into separation though, it might get easier (unlikely as I'm due my second baby in 2 weeks...)

Lardlizard Wed 16-Dec-20 21:41:35

Book how old is your son ?

OP’s posts: |
motheroreily Sat 19-Dec-20 06:53:34

No I definitely don't regret it. I've been separated 5 years and the last few months have been harder. But I am so much happier overall

daisyjgrey Sat 19-Dec-20 07:02:27

No. Never.

Never stay together for the kids or for any reason other than because you love each other and want to be together. Awful relationship model for children to grow up in, they won't thank you in the long run.

2anddone Sat 19-Dec-20 07:26:32

I used to think that.....then lockdown happened! Xh used to come round to see the dc twice a week (they refuse to go to his) but he stopped as said he couldn't come in the house! He came round 6 times in 6 months and stood in the garden to talk to them. I learnt to be much more independent and am actually loving it being just me and dc now. He was very manipulative (I can see that now) and used me not knowing how to do some diy things as an excuse to come in all the time. He moved out 8 years ago and I am so pleased that this Christmas I finally get the Christmas I have been looking forward to just me and dc (he used to move home from Christmas Eve to boxing night but that's finished now it will be he will pop round for a cup of tea for an hour on Boxing Day morning)

CayrolBaaaskin Sat 19-Dec-20 07:32:18

No not overall but there are definitely times when I wished ex lived closer and could help out more. It’s hard work being a single parent. I love having my own space and making my own rules though

SuePreem Sat 19-Dec-20 07:34:03

no never. It is infinitely better for all of us to be divorced than living separate lives in the same marriage.

Hunnihun2 Sat 19-Dec-20 07:37:52

I do wish I had of stayed like your title OP for practical reasons only I agree with others it wouldn’t of worked in the long run.

Of course there’s days when I think it’s would be easier if DS dad was at home because now I’m the one to juggle everything alone. It’s only natural.

lanbro Sat 19-Dec-20 07:38:12

No, definitely not...we do get on well enough to holiday together, and we work together, and I moved in with him during the first lockdown, but all of those cement how much I couldn't live with him all the time!

movingonup20 Sat 19-Dec-20 08:09:14

I did, until my kids were grown, thought I could just enjoy life, then he left me the day after my youngest DD's 18. 2 years on ive jet an amazing man I'm grieving a bit the life we could have had if we had met younger, he is an amazing father to his (adult) kids and that's something we cannot have together (he and his ex also stayed together until youngest was 18 and his dw left him)

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