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Will Cafcass support 10yold dd

(9 Posts)

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Samba77 Tue 07-Jul-20 20:14:18

Hi, we have been going back and forward to court for few years, ex has not seen her dad for over 12months as she is so scared of him, last contact ended in her being barricaded in a shop with her grandmother as they feared for their safety when he went off on one! Police prevented contact. Previous court order prevents him going to her school as he has previously bullied and threatened staff and parents! He now has a wonderful solicitor on legal aid and judge keeps telling me not to keep going over the past!!! He wants her half of all weekends and school hols. He has police record for battery and domestic violence, lived off benefits in bed sit for years. I am a hard working health care worker. Dd says she will see him in a cafe once a month, what’s chances of Cafcass agreeing?? On paper I think he doesn’t have a chance but the judge seems to love him angry

OP’s posts: |
DawnMumsnet (MNHQ) Thu 09-Jul-20 16:18:54

Hi, we're just bumping this thread for you, @Samba77 - hopefully some Mumsnetters will be along soon with some advice and support. flowers

netflixismysidehustle Fri 10-Jul-20 20:44:53

When kids haven't seen their Dad for a long time then courts approve of contact to be short and built up once Dad has shown that he can be consistent.

I'm not sure if one a month is deemed acceptable but she's around the age where a judge would take her wishes into account.

netflixismysidehustle Fri 10-Jul-20 20:45:01

When kids haven't seen their Dad for a long time then courts approve of contact to be short and built up once Dad has shown that he can be consistent.

I'm not sure if one a month is deemed acceptable but she's around the age where a judge would take her wishes into account.

RupertBrown Sun 26-Jul-20 01:23:13

I think it’s difficult but if she wants to see him let her . Later on you may find she’s unhappy and having an unhappy child is not what you want . Unfortunately you can’t get rid of this dilemma .

Lonecatwithkitten Sun 26-Jul-20 09:06:39

How old is she? She sounds fairly mature not just saying no, but suggesting a cafe where it is public. If she is over 12/13 and is showing such maturity there is a good chance the court will listen to her wishes.

Bitchinkitchen Sun 26-Jul-20 09:08:40

Lonecatwithkitten

How old is she? She sounds fairly mature not just saying no, but suggesting a cafe where it is public. If she is over 12/13 and is showing such maturity there is a good chance the court will listen to her wishes.

...her age is in the thread title. She's 10.

Lonecatwithkitten Sun 26-Jul-20 10:05:59

@Bitchinkitchen sorry missed that. So her views will be listened to she sounds a very mature 10 year who understands she will be expected to have a relationship with her Dad, but is putting forward a method of seeing him that she can cope with.

hayleym1987 Wed 05-Aug-20 04:00:46

I hope they do listen, my children were 10 & 8 and were completely ignored, different issues, very controlling emotionally and mentally abusive father, but it's now been 2 years so they are now 12 & 10 and their opinion of their father is still the same they are still scared of him, and my 12 year old has always been beyond her years, the solicitor I have now specialises in cases like mine and says now my oldest is nearly 13 courts will pay more attention to her voice, sadly at 10 they rarely do, they say it's the parents that have to agree or the courts will do it, very unfair on children, good luck

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