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Child support money

(11 Posts)
indomitable101 Mon 17-Feb-20 21:25:00

Hello all, what is the law regarding this situation? I am a single mum of 2 kids their dad (He is a selfish, lazy and lacks ambition and makes decisions that will make him lose a pound while saving a penny- that's some of the reasons I sent him out + cheating etc). gives £X amount every month which I told him does not cover all their needs but said he can't do more than that as he is already giving much much than the child support calculator says. This month being half-term, I asked that he gives some money for their outings/club/activity but he said he does not have that I should pay and that he me back ( he never does).
So, a few days ago, I told him I need some money for groceries for the kids as the kids are on half-term & it cost more food-wise to have them at home but he said there is nothing he can do as he has no money. I have always been the only one doing everything since they were born until I sent him packing & insisted he has to be paying for them now as I have done everything for them alone for over 8 years. I bought everything.
I just called him and he said ”I don’t have to give” which to me means he has but as chosen not to give and I asked him to clarify the statement, he refused to.
I am wondering if perhaps the law/rule says/states that he can choose not to give money to feed them after he's given the monthly money he normally gives.

OP’s posts: |
vanillacheescake Mon 17-Feb-20 21:45:07

I take you have private arrange with him and he keeps pay it but you are not happy with it.
Is he working?
U can apply for child maintenance via webside.
They will calculate it depends on his income.
Its 10 % of his wage if he has kids over less than 2 nights a week.
I had private arrange with my ex , we share only one child and it didnt work.
I applied for child maintenance and they calculated what I entity to.
He pays £180 a months and its guarantee as the money are taken from his wages.
He is on sick pay for over 8 month now and money reduced till £65.
When I asked about extra.
He said he doesn't have it.
I was annoyed as he is out every week and spending money on alcohol and didnt want to give to his child.
I got another job and Im managing.
Dont need and want to ask anymore.
Some guys are selfish and u did right things to kicked him out.
Try speak to his parents to put him in shame .
It may work.
Good luck

timetest Mon 17-Feb-20 21:47:42

Have you checked the amount he gives through the cms calculator? If he gives that amount then that is all he is legally obliged to contribute.

Cluckyandconfused Mon 17-Feb-20 21:57:06

You’re entitled to whatever the CMS calculator says (based on a %ge of his income and how many kids you have), and nothing extra for activities or food during half term.
If I was you I would check what you’re entitled to and if he’s already paying more than that I wouldn’t rock the boat. Child maintenance is not intended to cover half of your costs. The idea is that when the children remain with the lower earning parent benefits top up the difference/they increase their income. For families, separation sadly means a lower quality of living.
If he’s not paying enough though I would go through CMS.

PumpkinP Mon 17-Feb-20 22:19:18

He’s right I’m afraid. My ex doesn’t pay a penny in child maintenance.if your ex IS paying above what cms then I would say you’re lucky.

FatherB Tue 18-Feb-20 11:54:27

If he's paying more than he needs to and your first reaction is to call him all those names and say he does nothing then I think he's dodged a bullet here.

Maybe i've just misunderstood, but you sound really unreasonable here.

strawberrylipgloss Tue 18-Feb-20 12:18:51

Have you checked the CMS calculator? That is the minimum that he had to pay for everything. It's a percentage of his wage and not calculated in a way that takes into account what kids need.

SoloMummy Tue 18-Feb-20 20:36:38

You're receiving more than the cms state and it is your role to budget that this on top of your own income lasts and covers all including half term.

Can I ask do you work?

PumpkinP Tue 18-Feb-20 20:39:48

gives £X amount every month which I told him does not cover all their needs

It’s not meant to hmm

HillAreas Wed 19-Feb-20 17:29:06

If he pays every month without fail and over and above what the CMS calculation is then you really don’t have a legal complaint to make.
Children get what their two parents can afford to provide for them, whether those parents are together or not. What use are all the “outings/clubs/activities” if you’re left wondering how to pay for their food?
You need to organise your budget better. Fathers can’t magic money out of thin air any more than mothers can 🤷‍♀️

Stronger76 Fri 21-Feb-20 08:42:42

My ex has never paid a single penny more than CMS says he is legally obliged to.

So we live within our budget. We plan for school holidays. We save up through the year for Christmas, birthdays, holidays. We don't do expensive activities, we meal plan and set a grocery budget.

I am now working ft and managing childcare with tax credit support.

My ex could contribute more but won't. Your ex has contributed more but now can't. Time to look closely at where to cut the pennies back OP.

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