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OH left me and I'm now resenting my new baby! Help!

(6 Posts)
Natasha2285 Thu 14-Nov-19 13:35:37

So I'm going to try and keep this simple but it is a very long story! In June I gave birth to my second child a baby boy, me and my partner had been together for 14 years and have 2 children together.. In August my partner started distancing himself he would stay out often around 3 nights a week, he would cause arguments to go out and to stay out, he stopped helping with the children and had little and no interest in sex even though he caused so many arguments about it.. In September he stayed out and decided to tell me he wasn't coming back no reason just that, he waited around 2 weeks before he came to collect any of his things and even then wouldn't explain why he'd left me and our children. After 4 weeks of him leaving I found out he was serious with another woman, he's now blocked my number and refusing any contact with his children.. I'm feeling so scared, alone, betrayed and hurt. But I've found that I'm also having some resentment towards my son as I feel the pressure was just too much and that's why he's left.. How can I stop feeling like this and what can I do now? He's left my daughter completely heartbroken and has no bond with his son at all.. Its all just getting too much, I'm completely on my own without any help and I'm finding things so difficult right now.

OP’s posts: |
Annaminna Thu 14-Nov-19 14:18:34

You need to see your GP who can refer you to see a counselor or therapist.
You are going through some very serious emotional trauma and it is important to get accurate help. I went through very similar situation (third time pregnant) 15 years ago. I feel for you dear!
Fingers crossed for you! And keep us posted how you are getting on.

Oakmaiden Thu 14-Nov-19 14:37:07

I don't know if this will help, but he didn't leave because the baby was "too much". He left because he is a selfish dick.

Frankly, the speed with which it happened after the baby was born shows he had no intention of trying, and was probably thinking and planning this before baby even arrived.

It is not your baby's fault his father is a worthless piece of nothing.

Buyitinbamboo Thu 14-Nov-19 15:03:14

oak is right in my opinion. I know you will be strugglin, you are going through an awful time. PND is a possibility so you need to see the GP but it's not your fault or the baby.

Natasha2285 Thu 14-Nov-19 15:14:21

Thank you for your replies, I believe that it was going on whilst I was pregnant as I have heard the rumours and everything is now starting to piece together. I'm booked in to see GP next week as I am finding it very difficult to cope with my emotions I'm even scared of leaving the house as everything has been so public over social media and I just feel like everyone is staring at me 😭. The thing that gets me the most is how he's just been able to abandon his children without a care, he was so close to my daughter who is 6 and she idolised him and he adored her, for him to just walk out and treat her like she doesn't exist just doesn't make any sense to me 💔

OP’s posts: |
kitk Thu 14-Nov-19 20:53:30

OP you poor thing! Can only suggest as others have that you see a doctor. And if you care what strangers on the internet say, your son is not at fault and neither are you. He's done this- nothing to do with anyone else

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