Child’s dad not bothering

[Lostandlonel]

I already have a son and I am currently 5 months pregnant with my second. Both with my now ex boyfriend.

Ex just isn’t interested in our son since we e split, told me he wants nothing to do with him, or this baby. Saying he doesn’t believe they’re both his (they are 100%) and is being down right disgusting towards me.

When I met my ex, he already had a son from a previous relationship. We were together 3 years before we had our first child together.. ex told me how he had to fight to see his son. Through the courts as his mum stopped contact for no reason, refused access etc. Was messy and horrible.

Now I’ve never once said he can’t see our son, I’ve got messages off him telling me he doesn’t want to see our son . I’ve tried over a period of 3 month(since we split) and he just isn’t interested.,

It is breaking my heart when our son asks for his daddy., and knowing he’s still seeing his other son., I just don’t understand why he won’t have a relationship with him?

I am really struggling with being pregnant. I had basically just found out I was pregnant for a month then he kicked me out of the house, left me homeless with our son whilst pregnant.

I just feel so worthless and it’s so hard with my son crying for his daddy.

Ex is now saying he’s blocked my number and is moving so I can’t trace him to ‘get money out of him’ I’ve never once asked for money, only thing I’ve asied is him to have contact with our son.

I’ve accepted this isn’t going to happen as nothing’s changed despite months going by..

I just feel so helpless and can’t understand why he’s acting like our son doesn’t exist ☹️☹️

[rageymcrageface]

I'm so sorry, that's despicable behaviour from him. It won't be easy, but you've tried, so I'd take him at his word and stop all contact. Better now, than somehow managing to force contact and then he stops again. Make your claim for child maintenance though.

What age is your son?

[HowamIgoingtocope]

Get thay cms claim in now. Please do this. It attaches to his pay so if you know his company, dob and no number your onto a winner. I'd make the first steps and try mediation. If he refuses you will have a stance to goto court . Keep trying. But remember you can't give a parent to see a child if they win want to. But you can get the payments to help you do so.

[Sarah8410]

I'm feel so sad to read your having such a hard time and What an awful situation to be in , but from the sounds of it he sounds like an abusive man, with clearly no respect for you, he should be ashamed the way he's treating you is absolutely disgusting.
I know it's hard to deal with now, but as time passes it will make you stronger and wiser and you will one day look back and realise you made a lucky escape... take it from someone who's been in a 20 years abusive relationship!
Get as much support as you can from your friends and family it will help xx

[Starlight345]

I think he is playing games with you. Go go to cms today . Your child is legally entitled to be supported by his dad. ... email him and tell him he is welcome to see d children when he wants and leave him to it. .. He then may well want to see child......... it is horrible for the Ds though . I don’t know why anyone would do that to thier child but frequently do

[Lostandlonel]

Thank you for all the replies.

I’ve contacted the child matitence, I told them he’s denting being our sons dad despite being on the birth cert and they told me if he denies he has to pay for a DNA!

I know this is going to stir the pot, but I’ve lost nothing as he is refusing to see son.

I can’t believe how often it happens, it’s just my son I feel sorry for.. but at least this baby won’t know any different I guess