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What's the hardest thing about single parenting?

(41 Posts)
Stressedoutmamma Thu 06-Sep-18 12:59:06

What's everyones thoughts on the hardest thing about single parenting?
Mine DD 4 has had a nasty sickness bug that she's passed onto me as she's g9ot better I've gotten very familiar with the bottom of a sick bucket. My mum has gone away for a few days to clear her head with my brother and my dog (thank god about dog I love her but the walks would have been impossible very active border collie ) after my dad died last month. So I am literally alone to look after a needy child and tidy up clean cook and suck up that I'm being sick every 15 mins and i feel like a train has ran over me. I just want to cry and hide for the next few days in my bed and just feel sorry for myself.

OP’s posts: |
Creeper8 Thu 06-Sep-18 13:51:22

Erm having no help I guess. I have 4. But then I know alot of single mums who barely see their kids as they have so much support so depends on the situation but for me I am doing it alone.

cloudsrainsun Thu 06-Sep-18 14:09:48

Not having any me time often.

HugeAckmansWife Thu 06-Sep-18 22:59:00

I think its not so much the practical side as the feeling that you have to get this right alone. If you are struggling with a parenting issue you can't muddle through together and sort of take solace in the fact it wasn't just you who messed up. On the plus side, when things go right that's all down to you too 😉

Faster Thu 06-Sep-18 23:01:16

Ah fuck that sucks. I hope you feel better soon.

I hate that I can be silent from 7pm til 8am. I have no one to talk to.

MyRelationshipIsWeird Thu 06-Sep-18 23:01:56

Aw bless you, I think this is it - you’re living right now! Dealing with the DCs when when you’re not 100% yourself and there’s nobody to pass the baton to. And you will get through it and come out the other end and carry on being a kick ass single mum because that’s what we do!

flowersbrewcake (cake for when you feel better!).

You’ve got this mama!

MyRelationshipIsWeird Thu 06-Sep-18 23:03:18

So sorry about your dad. I hope your mum is able to come and give you some support when she gets back to give you time to rest up too.

AtSea1979 Thu 06-Sep-18 23:04:54

Having no one to share the worries with.
Having no adult to speak to for days.
Being ill and having to muddle through.
Worrying what would happen if you died.

rightknockered Fri 07-Sep-18 00:20:45

Ugh. Hate being ill and still having to carry on. Hope it passes soon OP.
I have 5, and the worst is when I'm tired and snappy. There's no other adult around and I always apologise afterwards and hug them but feel awful guilt for days. Sometimes feel sorry for my kids that they're stuck with me, not even grandparents or a fun Aunt or Uncle

NewtScamandersNaughtyNiffler Fri 07-Sep-18 00:30:54

For me it's that my ex undermines everything I do and say. Either that or dealing with the DCs emotional outbursts after their dad has been a twat again

The practical stuff/lack of money etc is so hard of course. But manageable for me because I have an amazing family.

Strawberrymelon Fri 07-Sep-18 14:49:03

Making big decisions alone. Trying to be there for elderly relatives sometimes feels impossible. And coping when I am ill.

I hope you feel better soon.

NotWeavingButDarning Fri 07-Sep-18 14:57:29

Yep, being ill is definitely one of the worst bits. thanks
Also having nobody to discuss parenting things with (this site is great but they don't know your children, obviously)
And I find it hard to be 1 adult, 2 DC sometimes as I almost
never get 1-to-1 time with either of them and there has to be lots of compromising when they each want
to do different things.

HairyAntoinette Sat 08-Sep-18 16:49:51

I have literally nobody around. Aside the usual life grinding you down - the worst is illness. I always get my annual flu Jag now after spending 60 hours in bed and my 6 year old had to take charge. Tbf nobody ever died of a Weetabix OD. grin

I suppose the difficulty of doing much of anything outwith 9-4. There is no class at the gym, late night dog walk, cycle ride at dawn... It's just crowd-control with a first-aid kit at the ready.

Starlight345 Sat 08-Sep-18 19:34:34

When my Ds was young it was sickness either of us been ill.

Now my son is older I miss the perspective from someone who cares about my Ds as much as me.

Queenofthedrivensnow Sat 08-Sep-18 23:01:01

Having to deal with a complete dickwad of an nrp.

twattymctwatterson Tue 11-Sep-18 19:21:11

It's not the worst thing really but right now the thing that's bothering me is that DD, who's just started school, is home every other day with invites to events I can't come to because they're during school hours and I need to work. They're starting a kids gardening club every Wednesday from 2-3 which DD would love but even though it's in school hours, they must be accompanied by an adult. So DD has to watch her friends go to gardening club while she sits in class because I'm a lone parent who has to work and she's got no living grandparent close by

cherry1012 Wed 12-Sep-18 21:05:44

This is so horrible for you ! I hope you are feeling better now and I'm sure you pulled through ! This I think is the hardest thing as they completely souly rely on you so if your in bed you can't do their food or get them dressed play clean up wash etc but you do as you have too and what a hard experience it is ! My dd 3 Just gettin over same bug too and I didn't hav the bug (praying I don't either ) n still found it tough I felt completely alone we had to visit a n e too it was so hard but I was strong as I could be ! Did you go to gp? Hope you are better now xc

HappyHedgehog247 Thu 13-Sep-18 10:49:55

Dealing with a controlling ex.

Ellen7262 Thu 13-Sep-18 12:45:19

Having nobody to chat to when my DD has gone to bed!!

Iblinkedandiamold Thu 13-Sep-18 21:22:42

For me the hardest thing when DS was small was it just being me (and my family but not the same) at things like his communion, confirmation, school open days etc.
Now that he's gone and left home it's the loneliness, the empty house, the quietness.

WhatsGoingOnEh Thu 13-Sep-18 21:27:27

I missed having someone to share the happy stuff with - someone to be as thrilled about your DC's achievements as you are. Or to share a smile when they say something funny.

NellMangel Sun 16-Sep-18 21:49:32

The loneliness. I've got a job interview coming up. I'd love a pep talk or someone to offload to. Then once I find out the outcome, someone to commiserate or celebrate with.

Same thing for everyday life. If DS does something funny there's no-one to share it with. I worry I'll forget it all cos it's just me that can keep the memory.

Faster Sun 16-Sep-18 21:51:27

Well done in the interview @NellMangel what’s the job!
I got offered a job last week and it will mean a whole new start for DS and me. I’m fucking shitting it about telling his dad.

Faster Sun 16-Sep-18 21:51:53

For the interview that should read!

NellMangel Sun 16-Sep-18 22:01:02

Thanks faster it's an admin job. I need to draw a line under the last 2 years and feel like a new job would help. Am very anxious about it cos not had an interview for years.

Well done to you, will ex make it awkward for you or just make a lot of noise? Nothing you can't handle I bet.

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