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Start using Mumsnet PremiumEx not bothering with son
(5 Posts)Advice please ...
My ex split up with me before Christmas leaving me a single parent to our 2 year old son. In the new year we came to an arrangement that he would see our son every other weekend, he stuck to it for one month but that was it, my son is lucky if he seems him once a month at the very least , also when he does see him he will have him for no more than an hour which infuriates me considering he hardly sees him. I feel like I have to beg my ex to come and spend time with him... it's almost like since we've split he's lost interest in our son. My son has stopped asking to see him and about him etc.. and orang bothered about him anymore which upsets me as before we split there relationship was lovely. What do I do now? Do I just leave him to come see our son whenever he can be bothered? I've spoken to my exes mum and told her what has been going on and she keeps making excuses as to why he may not be seeing our son , but it's starting to wind me up! I just feel like he'd almost rather forget his son and just looking to start a fresh life!
You can’t make him see his son.
In your situation I think I’d have one conversation- and only one - explaining that he needs to visit his son every week without fail, and if he doesn’t, his son will lose interest and eventually forget his dad.
Then stop begging. You are only delaying the inevitable. Just get on with your life, you can do a fantastic job without your ex.
I am 13 years in!
From my experience, if he doesn't try now he never will.
I wish when my DS was 2, I would have told his dad to fuck right off. Dropping in and out whenever he could be arsed.
DS is brilliantly, but it breaks my heart now he's old enough to understand how low on his father's priorities he is.
DS finally said 18 months, enough is enough. He doesn't want a relationship with his dad, but it hurts him and I know he wishes things were different.
I'm really sorry xx
Thanks for your replies! It's my exes loss at the end of the day ! My son is an amazing little boy I guess I should be happy that he's just all mine 😂
I agree stop begging . My ex was the same . I stopped trying but Ds was still available for contact . It didn’t take long before it stopped.
My Ds hasn’t seen or heard from dad in 8 years now . I actually think he has coped with that better than his dad rarely bothering.
I am also of the opinion it is sometimes made too easy if you don’t push then he actually has to make an effort.
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