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What's normal

(10 Posts)
octobersunshine Sat 04-Aug-18 20:03:40

My DS was dropped back as arranged this evening. My ex partner and I don't have a great relationship anymore.

Ex partner has reduced his child support and the money he paid to contribute him in nursery.

This evening, I received DS as planned. My ex stood on the doorstep and asked if I had a tenner as he'd left his wallet at home and said he needed shopping on the way home. I said no. Then he said give me your bank card and I'll borrow a tenner and return it to you.

Now, I know it's stupid, and hindsight's a wonderful thing. But he took my card and got out 30 quid, but the worst thing was, he printed out my bank statement for three months. I know this because I phoned my bank.

I suspect this was the reason for him asking and I'm annoyed at myself for being so trusting. And I know he's done this deliberately in preparation for court.

Just wondering what my legal position is? Were about to go home i court anyway for a CAO. I'm making a case via my solicitor that he's controlling and coercive. Would this stack up? Would this count as evidence? The bank won't deal as a fraud case.

Is this unreasonable? Any advise I'd be really grateful.

OP’s posts: |
Ted27 Sat 04-Aug-18 23:48:44

Its not fraud because you gave him your card, PIN and possibly password. I suggest you change your numbers now and dont tell him again.

SusieQ5604 Sun 05-Aug-18 01:51:05

True you gave him permission but for TEN not THIRTY and you CAN use this to show control/nosiness (I'm a family law attorney in the US). Plus he needs to pay you back. And if he uses your statement, you didn't give him permission for that and your lawyer can ask him all about this. What a jerk!!!!

NorthernSpirit Sun 05-Aug-18 09:22:21

You have him the card and details. You need to say no.

Seniorschoolmum Sun 05-Aug-18 13:34:57

Agree with SusieQ.

Change your pin immediately. And don’t share it or the card with him again. What an arse.

PinkCherryBlossomTree Sun 05-Aug-18 23:34:18

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NellMangel Sun 05-Aug-18 23:42:26

I don't see what he gains in terms of the court process. He remains responsible for paying maintenance regardless of your bank balance.

guccihandbag Sun 05-Aug-18 23:47:57

Why did you give him your card and PIN number? Did you trust that he'd only use it to take the £10 and return it to you? Never give your card and PIN number to anyone, no matter how trustworthy you think they are. Hopefully he can't do anything with the statement he was after and if anything, his actions show him for what he is, Deceitful and dishonest.

LG123 Mon 06-Aug-18 00:42:59

You can print off 3 months bank statements from a cash machine!? I thought you could only get a mini statement with the last 10 transactions?

PerverseConverse Mon 06-Aug-18 11:11:18

He's trying to catch you out on what you are spending your money on. Or see how much you earn/get in benefits as a reason to try and drop his payments. I hope you get CM through the CSA or whatever it's called these days.
Even if he didn't have any money for shopping how is the your problem?

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