No time for myself- advice!

Just a cry for help really..

I fell pregnant when I 20 with someone who I was then in a relationship with. The relationship was not going anywhere, he was very controlling and violent so I ended it. Since he has not been involved and has no intention of being involved.

I was unsure whether to keep the baby as I am only young, had wanted to travel/ possibly go to uni etc and didn’t want to be tied down. It took me a long time to make my decision and eventually I chose to keep the baby as I did not want to feel guilty about an abortion and thought I was going to be supported by family.

The month I gave birth my mother said she was moving away. I have no other family in the area and obviously no contact with the babies father.

I’m just really struggling tbh. I feel like I’m so young and want to do so many things that I’m just not able to do now. I get asked on dates frequently which obviously I can’t go on as I haven’t got anyone to watch the baby. Even simple things like getting my hair done I now cannot do. I feel like all the fears which I had when finding out I was pregnant are now true as I am so alone.

After splitting with the baby’s father I was seeing someone else but the relationship was very toxic so we are no longer together. I guess this has bought on a lot of my feelings as I would love to go and date, go out with friends and have s bit of a pamper to take my mind of things but this can’t happen. I’ve been out for one evening in 9 months and feel like I am taking it out on the baby as I’m not happy this way. I love her but I need some time to myself.

If you have any advice it would be appreciated!