Rant about father

[BananaMilkshake13]

So ex has asked for contact...very inconsistent, DD saw him in April before that last august it's so inconsistent because he always claims on 'my terms,' and barely askes.
My 'terms' is notice, a week in advance & for him to tell me the meeting place as he so lazy he began to get reliant on me to provide everything. I always have to go along as DD doesn't know him.
He just cannot get it together and follow those simple terms.
I'm being so reasonable, just had enough.
Now he has crawled out from under his rock, asking for overnight visits....😒
Yeah right!
On top of that he has said he will refuse to give me his address or tell me where he plans to take DD as she is his daughter and I don't need to know....🤔
Sorry just want to rant.
I ignore him because he isn't sane!!

[Kingsclerelass]

You don’t say how old dd is but yes, you’re right, he’s barking mad. He’s turned up twice in a year, she doesn’t really know him, he is refusing to tell you where she would be. You have PR too and that means being sure she isn’t sleeping in a shopping centre and is going to be fed.
Yep, mad as a box of frogs. 😳

[Kingsclerelass]

On a more sensible note, can you arrange contact at a contact centre, so he can build a relationship with dd?

[EscapistTendencies]

Perhaps the father can arrange for contact at a contact centre, why should op sort it? Contact with a virtual stranger once every 6 months is hardly in any child's best interests. I'd carry on ignoring him, if he wants regular contact he can see a solicitor.

[BananaMilkshake13]

I just ignore now as had enough & think more damaging for DD to be around a father who clearly does not have her interests at heart.
Just so tiring & emotionally draining to receive requests like this every couple of months.
DD is 6.

[BananaMilkshake13]

Been threatened with court which I welcome but just know he is all talk and wouldn't actually pay for the process.

[Kingsclerelass]

It sounds like you’re right about court. If he can only be bothered to show up twice in a year, it’s unlikely he’ll have the staying power to go through the courts.
I wasn’t being flippant earlier, about a contact centre, I just think it’s important to be able to show that you offered sensible access, partly because one day he may get his act together and go to court, and you want to show that you weren’t obstructing their relationship and partly because in 10 years your dd may ask why she never saw her dad, and you don’t want him lying to her and blaming you.

[Starlight345]

I agree with pp offer contact centre . Tell him he needs to build up a relationship . If you do this you have the evidence you have tried . Obviously he won’t bother or be consistent which you will have evidence for .

[ohamIreally]

Agree with Starlight. Say that a consistent location in a secure environment would be beneficial to all parties. Let me know when and where and I will absolutely ensure DD attends. He won't do it, then each time he asks just refer him to your previous offer.

[ca101]

Another example of a dad who ruins it for the rest of us.