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Co-parenting nightmares

(3 Posts)
cazzieb30 Mon 12-Feb-18 20:44:07

Apologies for the essay. Really not sure how to deal with this or what to think. I've been seperated now for just over 2 years both our kids aged 9 (daughter) and 7 (son) have always said they don't want to see their dad. He wasn't very nice to them (got in their face shouting and hit them). Anyway there's a court order in place now and it stated that last year the kids were to spend Christmas day with him. When he came to pick them up they both refused to go, my daughter hit, kicked and bit me when I tried to get her to go. My son got put in the car screaming and began to hit the window really hard so told my ex to get him out. After 30 minutes of my ex telling me it's my fault and I'm causing the issues I told him to leave and shut the door on him. The kids also then refused to go on his weekend (he has them every other weekend). At this point he told the kids that because they didnt go xmas day and refusing to go again father christmas was taking the presents back! Anyway since the kids have been back at school they have been going to his as he picks them up from school, this means the kids have to go with him. Last Friday my son had an inset day so the ex picked our daughter up from school and then came to pick our son up. Again our son refused to go and because he brought our daughter home she then refused to go ... this time he told the kids if they didn't go they wouldn't get birthday presents! They've both come home today and told me that my daughter got to open her Christmas presents at the weekend but my son wasn't allowed his due to not wanting to go on Friday! Is it just me or is this really cruel?

Everywhereilookaround Mon 12-Feb-18 22:05:03

Oh that's so awful. Hold your kids close and let them know you love them unconditionally. What he's doing is child abuse... psychological/emotional. You need help. He's using the kids to hurt you. Please seek some advice soon xx your kids will be ok, seems like they have already sussed him out. Stay strong xx

NGC2017 Mon 12-Feb-18 22:41:26

I feel for you having to watch your children go through this. It was awful enough to read.
I agree it's a form of abuse towards the kids. The more it continues the more it will affect them so it needs to be stopped. I'd have to respect your kids wishes and protests not to go. What is your gut telling you? Can the order be changed following their reactions? Something needs to be fixed as you are going to end up with two very very sad children and that would be terrible.

I hope this gets sorted very soon x

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