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Confused, please help.

5 replies

Treacle86 · 02/02/2018 22:50

Hi ladies,
I'm having a bit of a problem, and I heard that this is the best place for advice, so here goes... I met a guy on POF and we met a few times.. I didn't sleep with him right away but when I finally did we were still getting on great.. Then one night he was to meet me for a meal, stood me up and blocked me on WhatsApp. Long story short I found out the other day that I am 3 weeks pregnant.... I tried to tell him and got ignored, so my friend stepped in, at this point I'd already decided to book in for a termination as I didn't want to do this alone.. 😢 he's contacted me since and begged me to keep the baby even promising to be there for every appointment and wants to be a father figure to my other children... However when I mentioned he would be more interested in the baby and my kids more than me, his response was "you're right but maybe we could still be friends" I'm such a mess I don't know what I did wrong and now I'm carrying his child and I'm never one to believe in abortion, typing the word alone makes me want to cry, I just don't know what to do.. He still hasn't explained why he ghosted me and now he wants to visit Sunday and its mainly to see my girl who asks for him a lot as they created a bond. My head and heart is a mess, I'm sorry for the long post or if I have offended anyone I just need some advice.

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sourpatchkid · 02/02/2018 23:03

You might get a better response in pregnancy choices but I just wanted to send a hand hold to you

You did nothing wrong, he's just not that into you. You'll never be a couple, please don't go forward thinking you will

I do find it odd he has a bond with your daughter when you said you'd only met a few times?

If you want another child, keep the baby but be prepared you might have to do this alone.

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ChilliCheeseMama · 02/02/2018 23:10

Don't do anything you don't believe in or know you would regret - whether that's having the baby or otherwise.

He doesn't have to be involved with your other children, and I think if you did want to keep the baby then I would prepare to go it alone and then if he is around it would be great :)

You can do anything you want to do! You haven't done anything wrong, and have told him the truth, the decision just lies with you, and I'm sure you will have a support network whatever you decide xx

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ThisLittleKitty · 02/02/2018 23:25

You would be alone if you kept the baby that's a fact. He obviously blocked you as he was done with the situation (possibly seeing others?) you said you've "met a few times" how many is a few as I would be wary of people creating a bond with your daughter that you haven't known very long just for them to disappear. It's up to you really but if you continue with the pregnancy I van guarantee he won't stick around.

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Treacle86 · 03/02/2018 10:13

Hi loves,

Sorry if I popped this in the wrong place, I am very new to the site lol but I will know next time, so thank you :).

I find it a little strange too but he always said he never had a daughter of his own, maybe that is why as he already has two boys which he see's on a regular basis. I think I am just hurt because while we were around each other he was incredibly loving and obviously giving me false hope but I met him on a dating site so I am guessing it's way more than just me and he is keeping his options open. I could kick myself over and over for falling for his crap. Certainly a lesson learned. Do I feel in my heart he will stick around? Absolutely not, if he can run away and block me just because of a meal and always avoids when I ask him for answers I feel I already have my answer. Thank you all so much for not judging and for your wonderful advice. I really appreciate it. ♥

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ThisLittleKitty · 03/02/2018 14:16

It's not the wrong section it's just really quiet in this group I think that's what pp meant. So you would get more comments in a more active section. (You could even try posting in the relationships section, plenty post about their exes in there and it's more active.) anyway good luck with whatever you decide.

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