Feeling ever so lonely(3 Posts)
I am a single mum of a 17 month old Dd. I have very little support so only work very little at present as I can’t afford childcare. I made some good friends when Dd was tiny, but they all work full time and have families of their own. So I find it’s just me and my Dd. And it’s lonely. I keep looking at going to groups but my confidence is rock bottom and I often think other mums look down at me for being a single mum. I don’t know how to get myself out of this rut. I feel like I’m letting my little girl down.
Hang in there OP. You should get free childcare (I think it’s about 14 hours a week) once your dd turns 2 so look into it and get her registered to start somewhere. I was really lonely too as also dodged baby classes as the assumption that I had a husband was always really upsetting. One woman actually recoiled when she found out I was single!!!
But persevere as one of the mums I met was also single and I realised I’d been just as guilty as assuming everyone else was in a relationship as they were!
I found a toddler group attached to the local preschool and now my ds is there a few days a week I sometimes have a cuppa with some of the other mums I’ve met there. I still have very low and lonely times, unfortunately feels like part and parcel of being a single parent, but it’s nice to at least have one adult conversation a week. Play dates are also a great way to get out there and less overwhelming than a whole group. I was just honest, picked a few mums at the playgroup, said I find groups a bit intimidating but would they be up for a play date sometime and got their numbers.
You aren’t letting your daughter down, you’re doing the very best for her that you can and I’m sure you’re a great mummy. You’re allowed to have a wobble, it doesn’t make you a failure or a bad mother, it makes you a human bean. Look after yourself lovely
It is really hard when they are so young do take heart in the fact that every year you will grow so much stronger as a person for being a single parent and every year brings more confidence and self-belief.
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