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Feeling ever so lonely

(3 Posts)
BubblesPip Mon 06-Nov-17 10:32:56

I am a single mum of a 17 month old Dd. I have very little support so only work very little at present as I can’t afford childcare. I made some good friends when Dd was tiny, but they all work full time and have families of their own. So I find it’s just me and my Dd. And it’s lonely. I keep looking at going to groups but my confidence is rock bottom and I often think other mums look down at me for being a single mum. I don’t know how to get myself out of this rut. I feel like I’m letting my little girl down.

Proudtrout Mon 06-Nov-17 12:20:06

Hang in there OP. You should get free childcare (I think it’s about 14 hours a week) once your dd turns 2 so look into it and get her registered to start somewhere. I was really lonely too as also dodged baby classes as the assumption that I had a husband was always really upsetting. One woman actually recoiled when she found out I was single!!!
But persevere as one of the mums I met was also single and I realised I’d been just as guilty as assuming everyone else was in a relationship as they were!

I found a toddler group attached to the local preschool and now my ds is there a few days a week I sometimes have a cuppa with some of the other mums I’ve met there. I still have very low and lonely times, unfortunately feels like part and parcel of being a single parent, but it’s nice to at least have one adult conversation a week. Play dates are also a great way to get out there and less overwhelming than a whole group. I was just honest, picked a few mums at the playgroup, said I find groups a bit intimidating but would they be up for a play date sometime and got their numbers.

You aren’t letting your daughter down, you’re doing the very best for her that you can and I’m sure you’re a great mummy. You’re allowed to have a wobble, it doesn’t make you a failure or a bad mother, it makes you a human bean. Look after yourself lovely flowers

PollyPelargonium52 Mon 06-Nov-17 15:19:25

It is really hard when they are so young do take heart in the fact that every year you will grow so much stronger as a person for being a single parent and every year brings more confidence and self-belief.

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