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Unsupportive partner .

(6 Posts)
BethLil Sat 21-Oct-17 09:09:56

Hey all
I need advice I have a 11week old boy .. when I found out I was pregnant me and my partner said we would try the birth came and was complicated and my partner was there first 3 weeks for baby boys life brilliant but now I'm really struggling.. he won't do anything to help me and just let's my exhaust myself yes I understand he works and all that but i need a break I went out for 2 hour with a friend leaving baby boy with him and baby was asleep but I get texts like "remember you have a son" making me feel bad for leaving him.. Why doesn't my partner understand that i need a break that I need me time.. he says he won't help because "i get paid to do it" ( child benefits and maternity pay) I am so so fed up and don't have anywhere to go if I was to leave .
I really feel being on my own and raising baby boy would be easier then "trying" to make a broken relationship work .
I mean I'm doing it all anyways and no benefits of staying with him..

Advice ladies what do I do 😣

Mamabear3017 Sun 22-Oct-17 21:45:49

Bin him
Off!

The fact he says things like "you are being paid to do it". He's a waste of space.

Do it alone, he's only making it harder

Louw12345 Sun 22-Oct-17 21:53:49

Definitely do it on your own, I got much more help from family and friends to. Also I think he's putting the strain on you and you would feel so much in yourself on your own. You deserve a break and spending time with your mates etc.

That text 'don't forget you have a son' is very controlling aswell

octobersunshine Sun 22-Oct-17 22:00:57

I had this experience too OP. I hated it, and in the end, the resentment just grew too much to carry on. Now I'm alone, it's so so much easier to know I'm doing everything alone than have the facade of someone who's meant to be supporting. Maybe talk to him first about how you feel and see if things improve?

BethLil Sun 22-Oct-17 22:25:34

Like sometimes everything is okay we seem to argue and get it all out and then everything okay and he's fine and helpful. He says he says things as "banta" and if told him banta is meant to be funny! But he obviously thinks he's Lee Evans or something..
Like I can see that while baby is young trying to work things out is probs best but when do you say enough is enough 😬😣
My head is a mess 😢😔

Louw12345 Mon 23-Oct-17 13:26:16

What's best is that you are supportive of each other. Arguments are healthy however you should be arguing over the same thing all the time.

He needs to understand when support is needed and when to joke around.

The longer your in the harder it is to get out. I was with my ex for 13 years I ended up mentally I'll pushing my own feelings to one side for my family. I got out it was hard but my kids are so much happier because they can see that I am truly happy.

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