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Single parent loneliness

(9 Posts)
Mm93 Mon 09-Oct-17 01:46:46

Hi all, at a bit of a loss, I wondered if any of you other lovely single parents may be able to help me out.

Without giving my whole sorry-for-myself back story, I have come here to ask how others deal with loneliness?

I've done everything I can think of. I've thrown myself into education and am at university full time. I have managed to gain some weekend time with my little ones so we can spend some quality time together. I read when I have no plans. I see my friends as often as I can. When no one is free I will go on little solo adventures that I have interest in. I remind myself of the positives every day.

But I still feel desperately lonely. It is such an odd thing, I know there are much worse things in the world to feel sad about, but it really does consume me (I would like to say sometimes, but a lot of the time) I'm not looking on advice where to find someone as that's not my intention - I just would like to know if anyone else has found something that helps!

DC are 2&6 so it's not like I don't have my hands full blush

Queenofthedrivensnow Mon 09-Oct-17 11:39:25

Where are you in the uk?

octobersunshine Mon 09-Oct-17 18:51:21

Hi OP.

I feel exactly the same. It's really hard to be so isolated. I suspect that many NRPs have no idea how difficult it can be to raise a baby and have little time to do anything else.

I don't really have much more advice than the things you touched upon in your post, all of which help. I just wanted to let you know I feel it too and you're not the only one

NameWithChange Mon 09-Oct-17 19:42:08

You sound like you are trying so hard bless you. Remember tomorrow is a new day, everything changes.

Have you thought of a pet? My DCs are nagging me for a puppy which is probably too much for me to take on but I think a kitten is on the cards. We always had cats and they can be so comforting to cuddle and talk to smile

Mm93 Mon 09-Oct-17 20:27:17

Thanks guys, queenofthedrivensnow I am in Oxford smile
NameWithChange I have, I'm not permitted to have pets in my house as I rent.
We had a cat, worked long hours so was a very hostile cat as I didn't spend enough time with her as a kitten, couldn't get close enough to her to de-flea her, house kept having to be fumigated and she would attack my DS. Nightmare!

We now have the safer option of chickens, haha. I sometimes have my mums dog over for a sleepover to keep me company!

NameWithChange Mon 09-Oct-17 23:32:53

Oh God!! That doesn't sound like a helpful cat in your situation!

Hellywelly10 Tue 10-Oct-17 00:11:55

Sounds like your doing amazing. I know how isolating being a single mum is. But remember there are many lonely people in relationships too.

NameWithChange Tue 10-Oct-17 01:23:08

That is a fantastic point helly. I was so bloody lonely lying next to a husband I knew I couldn't trust or depend on. He made my skin crawl. Free of that now!!

Mm93 Tue 10-Oct-17 07:03:47

Thanks everyone. I am having lots of problems with DS father currently too, which after speaking to a friend yesterday, made me realise that could be what's making me feel so isolated.

She also made a very valid point that I am one who enjoys to have structure and likes to keep busy, and with lots of new changes I am probably feeling uncomfortable while my foundations are currently having a dynamic shift.. And most of all, it's Important to accept it's okay to feel the way I'm feeling and just go with it! Xx

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