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When did you stop thinking about (hating) ex?

(9 Posts)
Nikitasol Sun 02-Jul-17 21:58:01

It's been four months since we split and I really loathe exDH at the moment. He's been really challenging, unsupportive and difficult and I just don't want to see him if I can avoid it.

I want to be reasonable though and try to forge some kind of relationship in the future. I also want him to not be in my head all the time which he is a lot due to the current state of conflict. When will this pass?

I really want to hope that in 6 months or a year I just won't feel so crummy all the time when dealing with him. Any advice?

DooWhaaDiddy Mon 03-Jul-17 20:12:41

I'm still in the early days so not much help....I wish I never had to see him again and look foreheads to the day I can be indifferent about him.

chips4teaplease Mon 03-Jul-17 20:14:50

We split up in 1986. He died a couple of years ago. If I think about him, I remember how much I hate him, and how thoroughly he deserves it.

lippy72 Mon 03-Jul-17 21:28:27

Feel your pain I'm not there yet but hoping it will grow with time x

Proudtrout Mon 03-Jul-17 22:25:53

It's been two years for me. I don't like him, don't want him in my life at all but am now in a place where I rarely think of him. It gets so much easier, I promise.
Have to see him weekly and play along for the sake of my son but that's just what needs to be done, then I can pretend he doesn't exist for the rest of the week!

Nikitasol Mon 03-Jul-17 22:41:50

Thanks.. good to know is not always going to be like this.

I actually can't sleep for thinking about it and how cross he makes me.

Starlight2345 Tue 04-Jul-17 14:45:53

I split with my ex 9 years ago..I haven't seen him since in 7 years but I struggle to even remember the basics about him..Like My ds is left handed..I think his dad was but don't properly remember.

At this point in time..Make contact minimal , obviously relevant communication about DC.

It depends how he is acting. .You are separated so unlikely to be your form of support. What is he been difficult about? IS it something contact related that you could sit down and work out a plan of regular access so there is less conflict?

Checkingusername Tue 04-Jul-17 20:09:33

Starlight, you have given me hope!!

I despise my ex & pray everyday il eventually forget and stop thinking about him.

I talk about him so much less & he certainly doesn't consume me anymore but I was hoping I'd eventually forget the basics about him as annoyingly I know bloody everything!

Nikitasol Wed 05-Jul-17 14:54:57

It is contact related mostly, and also his unnoticed by him manipulative behaviour. It's exhausting dealing with him and upsetting.

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