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Was I in the wrong?

(7 Posts)
newbie121 Mon 20-Mar-17 12:56:46

I've just got so angry with my ex. He lives 150 miles away and sees our kids every other weekend. We meet half way on a Friday afternoon and he takes them and then we meet on Sunday afternoon and I pick them back up.

He lives with his mum and dad. His mum and dad do pretty much everything for our kids when he has them which frustrates me but at least I know they are getting looked after.

My son is autistic and I really do struggle sometimes on my own. His dad has never been involved with our sons special needs. He's very lazy etc and can't be bothered to learn about it. He just drives me mad but Ive accepted things the way there are and I do my best for my kids. I love them so much.

So last night I rang him and told him how much I had struggled with our son over the weekend with meltdowns and his behaviour.

This morning he has rang me to tell me he has some football games he wants to play over the summer and he wouldn't be able to have the kids on 3 of the weekends he's supposed too. I went mad. I told them he's a terrible father, I told him I didn't understand how he didn't love the kids the way I do. I screamed down the phone at him. He got upset.

I dunno, am I right to get so angry about this? He said he would come and see them for a day over the weekend he was ment to have them instead but I feel that's still not good enough.

He just caught me on a bad day, I'm still stressed about the weekend I've just had x

user1487854472 Mon 20-Mar-17 18:03:51

Oh Hun, it's so frustrating isn't it? My dd's dad is a waste of space and everything comes before our daughter. Unfortunately, some dad's don't have that bond or need to see their children. I've also reacted in the same way in many occasions! It's hard being a single parent xx

Foslady Tue 21-Mar-17 19:41:04

I had to lose my shit with xh a few years ago when in the lead up to Christmas he called off 4 out of 6 weekends so he could pursue his hobby, reminding him that not seeing her went both ways and if she wanted not to see him as there was something she wanted to do as her hobby /see a friend I wouldn't stand in her way......

He's a lot better now.....

JonesyAndTheSalad Wed 22-Mar-17 02:30:30

Tell him it's hard luck. If he wants to play football then he has to find a day when he hasn't got the kids or his parents could babysit. Tell him no...HE has parental responsibility on those days and his arrangements are HIS issue not yours.

complexkane Wed 29-Mar-17 16:09:53

The guy is a moron. Even if he was contracted to play in these football matches and could not get out of them, he could easily get his parents to help. Maybe the kids would love to go to the match and watch him?! It is just a couple of hours probably on a Sunday, why on earth would he miss out on time with his kids just for that reason!

You were right to be angry and if I were you, would insist that he has them. The knob! haha

Starlight2345 Wed 29-Mar-17 16:17:45

So a 90 minute game, I assume it is the drinking session that follows that means he can't care for his children.

I think you have every right to loose your shit.

ZombieApocalips Wed 29-Mar-17 18:25:23

I've had to lose my shit when ex told me he's too ill hungover and wasn't having the kids 2 hours after he was due to pick them up. If only RP could stop being on parent duty when "ill" !!!

Can your ex's parents still have the kids? My kids are NT but definitely "not right" when contact doesn't happen.

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