Contact with Father 8 months old

[FTMum2016]

My DD is 8 months old. Me and her dad split when I was pregnant and he has had regular contact with her. Seeing her at my house 2 nights a week and doing bedtime routine with her then I drop her at his house (he's back living with his mum) for 2-3 hours on a Saturday. He's now changed job and will be unable to see her through the week as in his words there will be no point him coming! He hadn't asked to see her for longer on a Saturday so being the bigger person I said I was happy for him to have her for longer but to build it up slowly. He brought her back on Saturday and asked could he take her for 6 hours the following Saturday. This seems a bit much very soon as she is only used to spending a short time with him and is always very unsettled when she comes home as he refuses to follow her routine. We've also had issues with him not changing nappies/bibs in the past which also makes me worried. I've offered for him to have her for 4 hours Saturday.. am I being unreasonable?

[spaceyface89]

I have a similar problem with my son's father. He has about 3 hours with him on a weekend and I have offered him to do bedtime at mine during the week which he won't take up. Because his contact is sporadic I'm not willing to let him go more than 4 hours because he becomes very unsettled and ex doesn't stick to routine. I

[Starlight2345]

Could you suggest build it up and additional hour a week. Then if she comes back with sore bottom those issues need addressing before any further time is extended.