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How are you women so strong willed?

(5 Posts)
Louw12345 Fri 17-Feb-17 22:19:42

I read alot on here about how you stick to what's agreed etc but how do you manage it without feeling bad?

Iv posted b4 about my ex not paying cm and I managed to ring cms and got it up and running then ex says don't do that please but I said no got to stick with it. He told me he's paying nothing coz cms are sorting it. So I rang them they haven't spoken to him at all and that his last text year was 10 grand meaning he only pays 30 pound a week instead of the 50 pound he had been paying untill he stopped paying.

My point is I feel like iv let my kids down knowing iv lost them 20 pound a week and it's making me want to close the case.

2 of my girls need new school shoes which I can't afford asked him the othere day if he will take her and get some and he didn't reply but went out instead.

It makes me so angry. My mates say he stI'll loves me and that's why he's doing this but their his kids he's leaving without why can some men do this?

We have both moved on and since he's found out about my bf he's been acting up.

Will we ever be on the same page or not?

Starlight2345 Fri 17-Feb-17 22:32:30

Firstly you have not lost the kids £20 a week if he was not paying.

I would guess it is not love you but doesn't want you to have someone else.

Keep things as simple as you can.. Do not discuss your BF with him.. Keep bf out of ex's picture as much as possible.

The reality is some dads will pay and help out with extras some won't however .. If he is the kind that won't don't ask won't get it.He will feel powerful and still controling you moneywise and it will stir up your feelings.

How old are children .Are you able to work?

Louw12345 Fri 17-Feb-17 22:45:14

That is true about the money.
I never talk about my bf to him but the children do.
His gf likes to act like step mum and gets incontact with me all the time even thou she knows the kids dad has already told me.

Yes I think I need to get that into my head don't I. I can't make him to do anything

I have 5 between the ages of 15 and 4 I'm a full time student and struggling to find work that will fit around uni hours. In may I finish so can work any hours then.

Starlight2345 Sat 18-Feb-17 19:35:44

May is not that long away. It is though when you are struggling..Hopefully you will be in a much better position at the end of your studies/

Louw12345 Mon 20-Feb-17 11:31:18

I know yes iv started applying for more jobs again. Oh I have another 4 years but hopefully next year I will be in a much better situation coz I won't be relaying on the other parent to contribute to the up bringing of the children.

It is hard but it won't be hard forever, luckily my girls understand

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