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More horrible abuse

(20 Posts)
Newmummy87 Thu 16-Feb-17 10:11:38

Hello again, this group is really helping me at the moment
I had yet more abuse from ex yesterday regarding little one, he saying one thing thru solicitors letter happy with the access arrangement and another thru text message to me saying he wants 50:50 even tou this is not possible due to his working hours. I've also been slated all over social media, and and his very own solicitor letter it states 'members are committed to dealing with issues in a non confrontational manner' am so scared

TreesAr3Green Sun 19-Feb-17 09:37:59

I'm sorry your dealing with this, what a horrible sod he is! I guess he wants to not pay maintenance and have you do all telling child care? Save all the text messages and print off the social media posts, take them to your solicitor so these are on record. Your solicitor should write to his return thts etc but it will almost be on file should your case go to court again.xx

Newmummy87 Sun 19-Feb-17 13:00:08

I think it will end up in mediation then court, am being more than reasonable with him, with regards to little one. He always believes he's right. In his words he will take me to the highest court in the land. Little one is only 4 months old. Stressing me out so much

Squirrelzebra Sat 25-Feb-17 16:18:14

I am in the exact same boat. I've blocked my ex's number so he can't harass me. He's also threatened to do "anything it takes" to get our son from me. Make a timeline of events for your solicitor of all the messages and social media posts. Stay strong x

Newmummy87 Sat 25-Feb-17 17:06:09

That's exactly what I've done. Kept a diary and blocked his number. I've tried so hard to be civil and he just can't be civil with me. I've lost over 2 stone in weight thru worry, it's horrible. All I want is my little one to have there dad in there life.

Squirrelzebra Sat 25-Feb-17 17:12:47

Same here....lost just over a stone. I want my DS to have his dad in his life but I couldn't trust him as far as I could throw him......he's a vile human being. You seem to have your head screwed on which is good....took me a while but I'm getting there x x

KarmaNoMore Sat 25-Feb-17 17:15:27

One thing about social media: The people who cares about you, won't believe him. The people that don't, doesn't matter.

Solicitor letters: They are just the wishes of your ex written in fanciful language, but do not bear any legal weight. They prove nothing, the judge will not even read them. They don't have time for that. One thing though, never reply to them immediately, read, put away for a couple of days and reply only when you are calm and have mulled over the possible options.

If he is abusive, mediation is NOT for you.

If he is abusive, contact with his son may not be in the best interests of your little one. Put your child first, whatever society push you into believe. Having no dad in ones' life is much better than having one destroying it.

Newmummy87 Sat 25-Feb-17 19:07:13

My ex has done himself no favours with regards to social media and his silly rants. His solicitor letter was full of silly requests lncluding a DNA test which I have agreed too!! Ex hasn't seen little one for 6 weeks now it's shocking. I've not denyed him access, he's denyed himself! It's sad!!
It's only recently that I've screwed my head on, I was everywhere for agers

Squirrelzebra Sat 25-Feb-17 19:20:19

It is sad that because they are unreasonable and stubborn they end up losing out x

Newmummy87 Sun 26-Feb-17 08:53:48

Yeah he's missed out on so much. But yet it's all my fault
Such a nightmare 😞

EweAreHere Sun 26-Feb-17 08:56:58

Your little one sounds like he might be better without his father in his life. Abusive men are not good fathers or role models.

Keep a copy of every single thing he texts, emails or says to you (write it down and date it). Totally agree that mediation is not the way to go if he is vile and abusive.

Newmummy87 Sun 26-Feb-17 09:14:19

He try's to contact me through his mum, saying am a liar etc! All i text back now to her is am not arguing with you! no idea how am a liar tho 😒

abbsisspartacus Sun 26-Feb-17 09:17:55

Unblock him and put your SIM in a phone for him to vent at get yourself a new number for everything else when he goes too far with his threats go to the police

Newmummy87 Sun 26-Feb-17 09:26:45

Police have been round to his already over text messages and warned him. I rang them last week and they just told me to speak to my solicitor. But I am going to get a new number that's a very good idea.

Squirrelzebra Sun 26-Feb-17 09:29:55

I would see your solicitor and see if you can get a non molestation order against him....see if that works x

SandyGEE12 Sun 26-Feb-17 09:59:28

Keep screenshot of Facebook and texts.

SandyGEE12 Sun 26-Feb-17 09:59:31

Keep screenshot of Facebook and texts.

Newmummy87 Sun 26-Feb-17 10:40:10

What's one of them please?

Yes I've got all messages and all fb statuses.

Squirrelzebra Sun 26-Feb-17 10:46:23

A non-*molestation order* is aimed at preventing your partner or ex-partner from using or threatening violence against you or your child, or intimidating, harassing or pestering you, in order to ensure the health, safety and well-being of yourself and your children x

Newmummy87 Sun 26-Feb-17 10:55:43

Ah right thank you so much.
I will definitely speak to my solicitor about one of them

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