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Help my 3yr old with daddy moving 8hrs away

3 replies

user1470251083 · 18/01/2017 11:09

So me and DS dad split in August. A few days after Christmas he dropped DS, 3, back home and told me he was moving 320miles away that evening. Doesn't bother me in the slightest! Now my DS on the other hand... he is a complete daddy's boy and since his dad has moved away has started to hit me, bite me, scream and just a very angry and upset little boy. Even a sad sounding song will set him off Sad. He isn't like this with anyone else, nursery are shocked when I talk to them about it. Basically, I'm looking for advice on how to help him through this. I'm from a broken home but my parents split when I was much older. I just want my little boy to be happy again.
Dad calls him daily and video calls when he can. We're also arranging for him to go and stay with him for a week during school holidays.
When dad was in the same town, he wasn't exactly reliable. Didn't always stick to arrangements made. Calls weren't daily. Maybe seen him once or twice a week. (That was to hurt me, he didn't want me to work or meet anyone new...)
I just don't know what to do!

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BlackeyedSusan · 18/01/2017 18:54

He is taking it out on you because you are his safe consistent parent. I think it will improve. both of mine reacted in different ways to dad leaving. I have seen it in children in school. It is hard as the parent to put up with the backlash but it usually improves with time.

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redcaryellowcar · 18/01/2017 19:01

Do you have a children's centre nearby? They probably have some really practical advice on managing his behaviour in a positive way.

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Angrybird123 · 29/01/2017 08:57

My two are 5 hours away from their dad. They are him pretty often but there is always fallout afterwards. I make the eveing they come back as calm as possible- easy for that I know they'll eat, some gentle tv and bed. The least thing will set them off in a howling meltdown. It's hard but to be honest no different towhen he was closer. Initially they were travelling a fair bit but now he does most of it which is better.

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