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Ex applied for child maintenance what do I do now

(69 Posts)
Jordpd Tue 08-Nov-16 17:43:42

Split up with my ex earlier on this year and she moved back to her hometown I met someone else soon after and I didn't have no contact with my ex at all throughout the whole pregnancy. Last time we spoke she said she didn't want me to have anything to do with him and I agreed. I've now recieved a letter today he is 2 weeks old do I have to pay? Even though we both agreed i would have no involvement. The reason is because our relationship was toxic were 100 miles away from eachother its going to cause a lot of hassle.

StopLaughingDrRoss Tue 08-Nov-16 17:45:21

Of course you do - it is your child and whether you want to be involved or not, you have a financial obligation to provide for him.

MistresssIggi Tue 08-Nov-16 17:45:21

I assume she has applied for child support not maintenance.
If it's your child, you support it, otherwise you're a twat.

qwom Tue 08-Nov-16 17:45:40

Unfortunately you will have to pay if the child is yours. A costly lesson in triple checking contraception...

Waltermittythesequel Tue 08-Nov-16 17:46:03

This can't be real...

MistresssIggi Tue 08-Nov-16 17:46:31

...though your disinterest in your baby son makes you already sound like a twat to be fair.

dotdotdotmustdash Tue 08-Nov-16 17:46:36

Involvement or not, you're still the baby's Father and you're equally responsible for his welfare until he's old enough to leave school. Didn't you know that when you were making a baby?

IneedAdinosaurNickname Tue 08-Nov-16 17:47:00

Yes you do.
Wtf wouldn't you?

Bubblegum18 Tue 08-Nov-16 17:47:07

You create a life and you are finiacially responsible for their life until they reach adulthood of course you pay

WeAreEternal Tue 08-Nov-16 17:47:32

Yes you have to pay, legally and morally.

You created the child, it's your responsibility to support it, regardless of wether or not you plan to be involved.
If you didn't want the responsibility of supporting a child you should have been more careful not to conceive one.

OddBoots Tue 08-Nov-16 17:48:11

"do I have to pay?"


Bubblegum18 Tue 08-Nov-16 17:48:15

I'm wondering if this new person isn't aware you've fathered a child with someone else and thought by going no contact it would have been swept under the rug.

twattymctwatterson Tue 08-Nov-16 17:49:47

Why would anyone even admit to being this foul?

AllPowerfulLizardPerson Tue 08-Nov-16 17:50:15

Yes of course you have to pay!

You have the responsibility to do the best by your DC. Thus includes, but is not limited to, paying maintenance reliably (on time, in full, and in realisation that the CSA figures are a minimum and do not necessarily reflect the actual costs of a growing person).

Jordpd Tue 08-Nov-16 17:50:45

It's not that I don't care I just feel like she has done this to spite me. I didn't know he was born until I got this letter today. She doesn't have anyway of contacting me as I have her blocked but surely she could of got in contact somehow

Crazycatlady83 Tue 08-Nov-16 17:51:30

Regardless of whether you see the child or not, of course you have to pay! Just cos you don't see your son, doesn't mean he won't need a home / heating / water / food / nappies / clothes / shoes, shall I go on?! May I suggest keeping it in your pants until you grow up?

WaitroseCoffeeCostaCup Tue 08-Nov-16 17:52:35

Good grief. Yes you have to pay!

Jordpd Tue 08-Nov-16 17:53:35

She said she didn't want anything from me when she moved back home £120 a month is a lot for me each month

ChuckGravestones Tue 08-Nov-16 17:53:53

She doesn't have anyway of contacting me as I have her blocked but surely she could of got in contact somehow

Yes she has - that was the letter you received today. Rocket science it is not.

Just pay the child support and be happy that she is taking the burden of bringing your child up without you having to lift a finger.

WaitroseCoffeeCostaCup Tue 08-Nov-16 17:54:59

It will be costing her much, much more if that makes you feel any better.

MalcolmTuckersEyebrows Tue 08-Nov-16 17:56:49

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Waltermittythesequel Tue 08-Nov-16 17:57:30

You blocked her, so she found a way to contact you, you twat.

It makes not one iota of a difference how you feel or where you moved.

You create, you pay. Simple.


EweAreHere Tue 08-Nov-16 17:57:42

Babies need things, just like you do. You have an obligation to help provide them, not matter how you feel about the mother and no matter how far away you live. The baby doesn't stop needing things to live just because you don't live nearby and it's 'inconvenient' for you.

Grow up. Support your child. It's certainly not the child's fault.

CocktailQueen Tue 08-Nov-16 17:57:45

Only £120 a month??? That won't nearly cover the costs of bringing up a baby or the equipment.

Don't be an arse - of course you have to pay to support your own child. Who do you think should pick up the tab - the state?!

Be more careful about contraception in future.

MalcolmTuckersEyebrows Tue 08-Nov-16 17:58:25

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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