Getting your Ex off the sofa?

[emski1972]

So tell me ladies how is it done?
EXH has 75k in his bank from taking his share of the equity. He thinks renting is a waste of money but can't get a mortgage and spare room.com doesn't seem to be working either.
How can I get this man to move out of my house?

[Nellynobbler]

If he's got his share of the equity is the house not yours now? Give him a months notice & then change the locks.

[Nellynobbler]

Do you have a proper financial agreement in place? Mine had a deadline written in.

[emski1972]

I already gave him a month we had agreed on the 1st November..
Jeez do I really need to change the locks that makes me feel sick...he's not a bad person just utterly useless...

[emski1972]

I've been stupid I thought I could avoid a solicitor and was hoping it would be amicable. I should probably go and see one now...

[PigletWasPoohsFriend]

You need to get everything formalised.

[Nellynobbler]

We ALL start out wanting it to be amicable. Unfortunately, the fact that you wanted a divorce shows deep fissures in your relationship. The same deep fissures will mean he behaves like an arse at some point in the proceedings. Of course he doesn't want to go, that means facing/accepting painful change. Lawyers are an expensive pita but they do get the job done. My dh swore blind he was NEVER leaving. Two months later his own lawyer forced him out.

[emski1972]

Thanks I might have to sell up and get him out that way...off to see a solicitor for me..

[NooNooMummy]

A bit late. But thought I'd share my experience here - I had a STBXH who refused to leave so I just changed the locks and sent him a text telling him to stay away. The police were sympathetic when I called them after he threatened to break in - they just wanted to know that I was the owner. Unfortunately, my actions felt extreme but justifiable - we'd had to leave because of his behaviour but I was still paying all the bills and couldn't afford to pay for another place too, my daughter wasn't able to go to nursery while we were away and, sadly, the police had already been involved because of his appalling behaviour. I had started gong through the proper legal route ie an occupation order but it was taking ages and ages to set up the mediation that you have to show that you've tried before gong to court. So I just took matters into my own hands and it's worked out ok. I'd head of other couples where one partner just did the same thing. It sounds like you Ex is just pushing his luck... Best wishes to you