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Advice on holiday arrangements please

(3 Posts)
StinkingNorthener Mon 24-Oct-16 04:16:59

Ex and I have quite a relaxed agreement where he has ds on the days he's not working. So far for birthdays and Xmas we've done it where ds will wake up at mine on his birthday that year and spend half the day at home then his dad will pick him up and for Xmas he wakes at his dads then comes home after Xmas dinner then we just alternate each year. So far this has worked great but now ex is in a new job where he can never have ds birthday off. His solution is for me to have ds all day on his birthday and him to have him all day Xmas every year so I would always have to do Xmas on boxing day. Obviously I don't mind this but I would like to have ds on Xmas day waking up at home even if it is alternate years. At the moment neither of us drive so it's not an option to take ds down straight after opening gifts in the morning as we live 15 miles apart but by next Xmas I should have a car. Has anyone been in this situation and what did you do?

itlypocerka Mon 24-Oct-16 06:15:19

No personal experience of this but I wouldn't agree to this suggestion. You shouldn't have to lose out on something so important because of your ex's career choices. A 50:50 split of birthdays and a 50:50 split of Christmases aren't an interchangeable substance. Your ex has chosen a job that means he can't have his "fair share" of birthdays - his choice. It does NOT therefore follow that you should lose your fair share of Christmases. Say no.

NapQueen Mon 24-Oct-16 06:19:24

As above.

Keep the Christmas swap (wakes your house one year his house another year).

Birthdays he has with you and then he and his dad celebrate on whatever day he takes him closest to his birthday.

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