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(4 Posts)
Louw12345 Tue 28-Jun-16 22:38:08

Hiya I'm not sure if I'm posting in the right place but worth a try.
6 years ago me and the ex broke up during this time I found out I was having twins and asked if that the children could have both over last names. He didn't see other children during the brake.
We got back together and forgot about the name thing. We have broke up again (now for good) and again contact stopped.
My elseat daughter had said that she didn't want her dad's last name due to him not seeing her and his family being the same as him.
I spoke to her about her last name is who she is and that changing her name will not mine anything. In return she said it will help make me feel part of your family ( my sisters and brothers) I then said that you are part of my family and your name will not change that.
We spoke about that if she feels the same the possibility of double barrelling her last name might be an option if her dad agrees.
She said she will think about it and see how she gos. Weeks go by and my sister said she will take her away. My daughter got in a panic about her passport and asked her dad for permmison to add my name. To which he ignored her and she got upset and said see I don't want his name I want yours. Still trying to explain that by totally removing her dad's last name will not change anything.
It really hurt that she feels in such a way and although I would love to add my name I still need their dad's permission.
Anyway I'm looking to take them away next year and heard that if the children have a diferent last name I will need written permission off their dad. Which has really pissed me off, as I'm their sole carer he comes and gos as he pleases.
So we had our first mediation and I brought it up. He didn't like it one bit. He said I don't see why you want that, what are you gaining from it.
I said nothing but I'm their mum and I don't need to ask you for permission to take my children away and I don't trust you would give me the permission or say you would but you don't end up doing it.
Anyone what I want to know is if this is a law about the letter of permission and he won't let me add my name what do I do?

Lonecatwithkitten Wed 29-Jun-16 13:12:19

The law states that if you do not have a child arrangement order you need permission from the other parent to travel abroad ( regardless of names etc.)
Most of the time there is no problem, but certain countries are more of a problem. Without the permission there is the risk that you could be held at the port.
I type a letter stating permission to travel and the just ask my Ex to sign him when he drops off ( I do have a discussion by email first) so there is no effort required on his part.

Fourormore Thu 30-Jun-16 07:44:46

As lonekitten says, it's nothing to do with having the same last name. The law is that you have to have permission from everyone else with PR unless you have a child arrangements order.

If he won't agree then you will need to get a specific issue order from court.

FabulousoFanjo Tue 26-Jul-16 19:44:35

Hi im from Northern Ireland and plan on taking my kids 2 england for a family wedding. Just wondering if i will need exes permission or is it different because it's still in the uk

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